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I belong to Kshatriya caste and my parents are considerably particular about the point of caste when it comes to marriage. We can be friendly with anybody that belongs to any caste but we should marry only those girls that belong to our caste. This is the belief and practice prevalent in the state of Andhra Pradesh. I started hating the point of caste as my outlook toward the world was getting polished. One day I saw an interesting matrimonial ad in a local daily. The girl is very beautiful, well-educated and above all she belongs to our Kshatriya community. My parents, brothers and relatives feel very happy if I marry some girl of our caste. I immediately called up and knew that it was a marriage bureau in Hyderabad that posted the ad of that bride in that newspaper that Sunday. They told me to come down to their office to know more details about the bride. I understood that I became a victim to them because I don’t like going to marriage bureaus in search of a bride for me and yet I went to their office that evening itself. I gave them two of my color photos and paid them 1200 rupees to become a paid member. They won’t show me the photo of the girl I desired to see unless I become a member in their setup. Eventually they showed me the photo of the girl and I liked her beauty and educational level compared to other brides available with their marriage bureau. They told me that the family of the girl has a property worth 1 crore rupees and they belong to Bhimavaram town in West Godavari district. Upon my request, they informed them about my interest in their daughter. After one week, when I called them up to know what happened, they told me that the parents of the girl were in the process of winning an NRI boy for their daughter and it means that mine is a waiting list. It is money and the status of the bridegroom that is important for them and not caste only. Then my monthly salary was 8,000 rupees and working in a small press in Hyderabad. They did not find me attractive. There was no any further communication from them. Perhaps they could marry their daughter with that NRI. There were one or two calls only from the marriage bureau during the two years that followed. They informed me to come down to their office and have a look at the recent photos of the brides from our community. I went there once and did not find many photos of the girls. I did not like them because they were not that beautiful. Marrying an exceptionally beautiful girl is my mission and so I don’t compromise on this point at all. If I ever marry an ordinary girl, it is virtually like a death to me and still I live because I should not commit suicide. I developed aversion and dislike for marriage bureaus and their useless activities after this personal experience in my life. Only 5% success rate would be there. Many think that somebody gave his or her photos and profile in some marriage bureau means they have a bad character or they are ugly or they are old. They came there as a last resort to find somebody and marry at the earliest. This is not true in all the cases. Many go to marriage bureaus to choose one from many options. When our circle of friends and relatives is very little, there is nothing wrong in going to a marriage bureau. One should keep trying every channel available to find a right partner. Marriage bureaus unite a bride and a bridegroom in a commercial manner. I took much time to understand that marriage bureau is a wrong place for me. I like to marry somebody on my personal choice and for that I need to follow some ways I consider good. I have bad experience even in the case of my close friend who consulted a few marriage bureaus for finding a girl to marry. Both of us are idealists and we should not go to such places to find our dream girls. We should be known to many girls through our efforts and then only somebody can like us and decide to marry us liking our professor or personality. This is the right spirit of universal love. I am thus waiting to find my angel of beauty. There are thousands in India. Can’t I win one?
Datla Chiranjeevi Raju
