DEATH

Death means end of life. Life is presence of a soul in a body. Soul is intangible but eternal. Body is visible but transitory. Soul has no feelings. Body has feelings, emotions, passions, dreams, fantasies and uncountable attachments with many occurrences and phenomena in this material world. Though millions of creatures have been dying over the centuries, I focus on the death of man only in this piece of writing because it seems to be the most challenging phenomenon in this world for me. When I see it before me or think about it, I suffer silently because I cannot do anything more than that. This is what, in fact, millions of humans have been doing ever since the origin of man on this planet. They are suffering for a short while, for a few months, years and even till the end of their lives, remembering the deaths of highly important persons in their lives. Thus, death remained as a permanent challenge to humanity for ages. Death implies separation, loss, pain, suffering, haunting memories and tragedy for all of us.

Death occurs in different ways around us regularly. Natural death, which occurs after one crosses 80 or 90 years, causes us less pain than others because we take it as natural and inevitable for all. Death during old age also causes a lot of pain to all those directly related to one but they slowly can digest that truth and continue their lives normally. Even others can console them easily in this context.

Premature death is the most painful event and experience for millions of people in this world.

Still birth means the entry of a dead baby into this material world with no purpose at all. The parents, siblings, grandparents, relatives and well-wishers of that baby would have weaved a lot of dreams around his or her future course of life after birth. It means we develop a lot of psychological attachment with creature in the womb of its mother also. If that star of our hopes and dreams appears us dead, soon after birth, that pain is also immeasurable. For outsiders, it may look absurd and illogical but we understand the intensity and rationality of much pain and loss only when we experience it personally. Some can empathize but many fail to understand the tragedy of realities from such sensitive and ideal perspective and state of mind. Mother carries baby for all those days. She can never forget that truth of loss and pain in her life. It means many mothers are suffering in this world recollecting still births.

The death of a girl or boy from age 1 to 20 is more intense and lasting than the one described above. If a boy or girl is growing under our direct care and guidance, as a son or daughter, or otherwise, which can be compared to the status of our children, we develop a lot of physical and psychological attachment with them. The more the number of days they spend with us, the more our pain if we lose them somewhere in this journey of intense relationships. The death of an unmarried girl or boy is less painful than that of a married one because marriage connects one to an external creature. What about the life of a married guy if he loses his wife shortly after their marital union? What is the image we have for a boy looking to marry a girl for the second time, after the death of his first wife for some reasons? Second marriage assumed a sort of low value in our society compared to first marriage. What about a girl losing her husband within a few months after marriage? What if she was pregnant by the time her husband passed away? How many of us like to marry a girl with a child or children born out of her marital relationship with her first husband? Though we believe that we are great human beings, our thoughts and plans are actually very narrow. We have somehow passion for fresh objects and persons only. We like unused items of consumption only. Death before marriage causes pain to his or her parents and close relatives only but death after marriage creates many problems in the life of the other creature. Particularly girls suffer more in this context than boys. Many boys and men consider innocent and helpless widows as potential sources of bodily pleasure for them. They try to somehow attract them thinking that they are going to do a lot of favor to them with offer of bodily pleasures secretly. I strongly believe that every widow or widower must marry somebody of similar tragedy to keep her or his life happy and balanced. Basic instincts keep influencing and chasing every human being as long as they are physically and psychologically healthy. It is the nature of human body. We should not blame it. To avoid that sense of loss and pain, physically and mentally, marriage is the best option. There are many around us but few have time and interest to spend with us if we are not related to them at all. It means all human beings do not behave with kindness and love towards lonely and sorrowful ones also. If we want love and companionship in our life, we should search and find such ones, who are suffering with similar set of problems, instead of those who are more comfortable and happier than us. Happiness and sorrow, richness and poverty do not go together as sorrow and sorrow and poverty and poverty. There are very few idealists around us. We are very lucky if we get such people in our lives, early or late.

The death of a person between the age of 21 and 60 is also tragic and painful. If he or she fulfilled most of the responsibilities as a husband or wife, father or mother, or otherwise, during this age range, such death may, partly, be considered less tragic. Since the time a baby starts drawing milk from the breast of its mother, it subjects itself to a variety of responsibilities to be fulfilled towards others. Husband’s role is to look after his wife and other dependents. The role of a traditional homemaker is to take care of her husband, children and other dependents, providing them with various services, time to time. What if such great woman or man dies without fulfilling those vital responsibilities? Many exploit and bother such family members, taking advantage of their helplessness and vulnerability, after the disappearance of a key person in that network of family bonds. If we are crying after the death of a person, he or she contributed, directly or indirectly, to the comfort and happiness of us or some or many known to us. It means even the death of a person does not move us at all if we do not get some benefit from him or her. We cry selfishly always. We rarely suffer for others irrationally and illogically.

The death of a person from the age of 61 to 100 is less painful compared to the deaths of persons of less age range than this because we all accept the bitter truth that death is inevitable for any creature which has the qualities of life and existence. Our parents and others, when growing more and more after 60 years of age, look negligible to us because we are not going to get many physical and other kinds of benefits from them at this stage of their lives. It means most of our relationships are highly commercial and self-centered. We do not love our parents also if they do not make our lives comfortable and happy in many ways. How many Indians love their parents if they do not get anything from them in their process of growth as human beings? Parents expect very little from their children in India but children expect a lot from their parents at every stage of their growth. This is the extraordinary quality of 95% of parents in India. He or she may be a thief, beggar, criminal or corrupt employee; a father or mother is always thinking and working for the welfare of his or her children always. I wonder observing this idiosyncrasy of parents in India. Mostly they are living for their children. Even a 100-year-old man or woman suffers before death because he or she worries about the future of his or her children after his or her death. How great the parents in India are. If children do not cry and suffer even before or after the death of such old and helpless parents, they are worse than a thief, criminal and sinner. Tears are reflection of our innermost humanity. Pain and suffering are inevitable and inseparable elements of human life. We should cry and suffer regularly if we love this mysterious and attractive world. It is giving a lot to us. We fear our death because we don’t like to leave such tempting land and go away into unknown abodes of mystery. Death in old age must be accepted humbly and proudly by everybody. Children cannot bear that reality also because one, who brought them to their present level of physical and mental growth, left this world forever. The greatest supporter and guide of their lives departed forever. Nobody loves them as sincerely as the departed one. None of us can replace the role of a father or mother to other. There is difference between living and acting. Real parents live for their children. Others act some attractive roles for courtesy sake.

In all the deaths of above order, we observe a sense of loss and pain. Can anybody bring back the life of a dead person? It means God posed this highest order of challenge before all mortal beings in this world. Death is a universally applicable and inevitable command. There is no place for arguments and fights. Even the richest, the most intelligent and visionary, the mightiest, the most holy and powerful, kings, queens, emperors, undertakers, doctors, actors…nobody can fight back with death because it is the greatest commander of this world. It subdues us silently or violently. We have to yield to it completely.

Death may occur due to diseases, accidents, mysteries and old age. Death is the biggest villain and hero in human life because we cannot be as cruel and commanding as it is or as disciplined and ideal as it is. Death is approaching all creatures, slowly or early. All dead bodies are being buried, burnt or thrown away mercilessly even by those, who loved and lived with them passionately, when that soul is there in them. It means we can recognize and appreciate the power of intangible soul only when death hits the attractive and beautiful body of materialists. We talk and do a lot when there is soul in our bodies because it is the divine power hidden in us. Once that soul flies off, the body remains as a worthless symbol of decay, tragedy and pain widely present in this world.

We suffer a lot because of deaths of persons closely or remotely related to us rather than due to those of persons not related to us at all. Millions of humans are dying in this world, every second, due to various reasons. We know about them through different sources of information. We are all taking them as ordinary occurrences. We are not stopping eating food, going to films, doing jobs, celebrating our lives and doing many things just because of deaths around us or away from us. It means we are unkind and narrow-minded to a great extent. We do not bother even if somebody dies due to our negligence or cruelty. Many are dying on roads due to accidents. Most of these accidents are taking place due to careless drivers, defective vehicles or bad roads. How many of these creators of death are dying or suffering for what they did to others? Many car owners rush off after an accident caused due to them on roads and other places. It means the tragic death of a person is not a cause of pain to them. They shout a lot even if a dog comes across their path of driving. There are millions of people in this world who practice these double standards. We can observe this unkind and cruel phenomenon in highly rich and politically powerful persons across the world. Companies spend crores of rupees for the safety, health, comfort and happiness of their high cadre executives and bosses but they do not think about the deaths being caused by their products or services. Tobacco, alcohol, drug related industries are just a few examples for this phenomenon. They sell harmful items not minding about the diseases and deaths they are causing in a nation. Even farmers growing tobacco and other dangerous crops belong to this race of criminals in every nation. It means they are working towards the diseases and deaths of others always. Governments also spend unbelievable amount of money for the safety, health, comforts and happiness of politicians but what about those helpless and pitiable citizens of a nation, who are dying daily due to the immoral, unkind, selfish and illegal acts and policies being implemented by them. Various kinds and levels of governments sell cigarettes, liquor and fatal drugs to their citizens, clearly knowing that they die because of various diseases and disorders because of their detrimental effects on them. They create and continue problems to humanity in every modern state also. No ruler has genuine concern for the lives of others in any country now, including Barack Obama. He sends troops to Afghanistan in the name of war against international terrorism but he is indirectly killing hundreds of American soldiers and innocent people of that impoverished country in this process. It means all political heads are concerned about their welfare at many levels but not about the welfare of their citizens. Many countries are spending billions of dollars for their defense establishments, maintenance, personnel and ammunition. They are training death causers, whom we call soldiers. Unfortunately, soldiers are choosing that job being ready to die at any time in the attacks of their opponents. We are planning and systematizing many deaths this way in our countries. If every ruler is kind and generous in this world, there should not be defense personnel and ammunition at all. Modern politics is the most nasty and inhuman branch of human thought and action. These cruel and selfish rulers always think and work on the ideas and strategies related to frightening others and thus achieving supremacy over them instead of showering kindness, love and idealism on them. When such cruel killers are becoming our rulers, deaths would be immense in every part of the world. We, the citizens of every nation, unfortunately, are making and bearing such nasty rulers because of our foolishness and stupidity. They sit and hit on our heads. We take it as their great service to all of us. We are choosing sinners to further ruin our vulnerable lives!

Though we are mostly concerned about the deaths of humans around us, we suffer because of deaths of other creatures also like birds, animals and trees. We suffer a lot when a pet bird, animal, plant or tree dies because we admire them for their utility or beauty. It is satisfying our inner self someway. Even in this context, we are suffering and crying selfishly. Do we treat stray dogs and pet dogs alike? Do we treat public transport vehicles and private vehicles alike? Do we treat government property and private property alike? Mostly we love and care for what belongs to us deeply and directly. We are not bothered about rest of the things much. This narrow outlook and behavior of us is mostly the direct or indirect cause for deaths and pain around us regularly. We love our little birds and animals a lot. We provide them with many facilities in our homes and offices. What about the chicken, mutton and various other kinds of meat we are consuming daily. It is not our fowl or animal. Somebody grew it for his livelihood. Somebody else killed it and sold us its meat. We are just facilitating some unemployed victims live this way. What a great calculation from our perspective as regular and passionate consumers of meat at homes and hotels? Some creatures were born exclusively to be killed for us because humans are the lords of this world. Most of humans argue every case from their perspective of selfishness and benefit. This is why many crimes and sins are taking place around us. I don’t like anybody throwing a light dry stick also at me for fun also but I shoot animals and birds in forests for fun. I want everybody to be perfect but nobody should expect perfection from me. Persons with this outlook die the most dangerous and painful death in this world very slowly or suddenly. Death may be a punishment imposed on us by nature in many contexts but others don’t learn a lesson from such natural events and avoid committing such crimes and sins. The cruelty of man is such that he kills and tortures such creatures, which served or serve him a lot. This is why we should consider man as the most dangerous species on earth planet. He cannot live without exploiting or killing other resources or creatures always.

How can we lose fear of death or face it boldly when that moment hits us slowly or suddenly? I will present some observations to make you alert, intelligent and visionary in this direction.

1. Love your natural death. Natural death occurs after 60 or 90 years depending on how you maintain your body and mind in your life unless a fatal disease like cancer or heart attack hits you. Live with great habits which allow you to live with superb health in body and mind. You should not be a victim of accident or disease due to your foolishness or carelessness. Nobody likes to take care of you when you are bedridden or completely dependable upon others. Are you ready to serve somebody if he or she is bedridden for about 20 or 30 years in your life? You are interested in your life. Others are also intelligent and selfish creatures like you because they too belong to your race. Because you have more money, vehicles, comforts and luxuries, you need not misuse them to hurt somebody in your course of life. Love and care for everybody that comes across your life. They are silently and patiently permitting you to live like a rogue among them. How should you treat such great human beings? Salute those poor beings. Appreciate those sick and helpless patients in various hospitals and places around you. You are better than all of them. Thank God for it. Live like a sensible individual and admirable citizen of your nation. When you live that ideally, you don’t fear death at all because you love your death also humbly and proudly in that state of idealism. Narrow-minded and cruel persons only fear death a lot!

2. Spend considerable amount of time there, where there is a lot of pain, suffering and tragedy, as an active participant or passive observer. Go to dead bodies wherever and whenever possible, and feel that atmosphere of pain and suffering silently. Know that there is a lot of tragedy around you in the form of death. Spend time in and around graveyards. If many are crying around a dead body, observe it passively and understand why they are crying that badly. Is it for formality sake or from the depths of their hearts? You can assess human character better from this observation and experience. If they are crying really for the dead one, he or she did something good for them directly or indirectly. If all are playing some formal roles there for the sake of courtesy, unfortunately, he or she earned such idiots only in his or her lifetime due to his or her ignorance, foolishness or stupidity. Avoid thinking and living like him or her. Be there and feel that intense pain. If you always do such things, which keep you comfortable and happy, you fear tragedy and death. Realize, in time, that they may hit you at any time because nobody can escape from them. The more you understand and experience pain because of inevitable conditions in your life or voluntarily, the more you lose fear of difficulties and death. Read books of tragedy and see films of tragedy now and then. You understand life better when suffering because of something rather than enjoying your life. So, pain and challenges make you more humane, ideal and brave. Spend there as many times as possible to love death and pain around you. Don’t run away from incidents of death and experiences of pain but be a close observer of them. If you know about something a lot, personally or professionally, you lose fear of it slowly. Love death and pain also. Take death as your good friend. It knows when and how to help you. Accept when it comes to you but don’t call it proactively.

3. Read scriptures of your religion and other great books. Accord more importance to your soul and psychological growth than bodily decoration and material attractions. When you understand the futility and vulnerability of human body, you would start falling in love with God and understanding the core of your life. The more you grow spiritually, the more you lose fear of pain and death. Death is just a little phase of your long spiritual journey. Do you suffer when you are getting off at your destination after a bus or train journey? You will take many other buses and trains also in future. So, nothing to worry about the end of this short journey. There are many wonders and mysteries ahead. You will learn and enjoy a lot in that series of future journeys also. Every journey has to stop somewhere to start another exciting journey. Death is also a short halt in your long journey from ignorance and fear of life to bliss of God and divine space. There are millions of creatures as your co-passengers. You are not alone.

4. Frequently listen to classical instrumental music being alone. There is no language in instrumental music but divine power of spell. You need not decode meanings of any words in it as it happens when you are listening to songs with specifically written words depending on a context in a feature film. Classical instrumental music makes you calm, divine, ideal, healthy, visionary, spiritual, intelligent and kind. It silently teaches you to live for the sake of God, who created you but not for yourself. Your body is an instrument of God. Play it gently and ideally. Let others enjoy your presence just like instrumental music. Your life must be a living example of idealism and inspiration to others. Talk less and work more. How can you appreciate instrumental music? It has no life and senses like you to receive your criticism or appreciation. It serves you ideally, always struggling to give you something and never expecting something back from you. If you can be so ideal and inspiring, the thoughts of death further make you into a philosopher. You would understand and experience everything silently and make little noise. Great musicians of the world are agents of God appointed by Him to keep His creatures happy always.

5. Realize that virtues are the assets of our life. Virtues encompass great habits and qualities of human beings. If this world is so beautiful and comfortable today, it is because of exemplary contribution of hundreds of thinkers, writers, saints, social reformers, scientists, rulers, visionaries and philanthropists. They did a lot to keep you happy today, even though you are not directly related to them. What are you doing for your family members, friends, well-wishers, society, religion or others? Are you directly or indirectly helping them in any way? The more you think and work for others, the more you can be comfortable and happy. Empathize with others when talking and spending with them instead of always presenting your arguments and orders to them. Remember that death treats all alike. You should also treat others equally as far as possible. You can achieve it through patience and spiritually oriented life. The more you are growing physically, the more must be your levels of patience and tolerance with people and conditions around you. You must be changing continuously according to the pressing influences around you. When you were a child, everybody cared for you and treated you like God. When you grow up and become an old man of 75 years with feeble organs, very few like your presence and like to spend time with you. It means your age and appearance are also influencing others a lot. When you were able to give, there were many to take something or the other from you but when you are expecting something from them, when you are old and helpless, nobody is there to help you. It means 99% of humans are selfish and narrow-minded in this world. Don’t expect anything from them. Learn how to be comfortable and happy on your own. Don’t depend on others as far as possible. Do everything for yourself and be content with what you can and possess. Avoid expecting anything from others but keep trying to give something to others. When you don’t expect anything from others, there won’t be pain in you even if others are not caring for you. Assess your future today and be prepared accordingly. Analyze the characters of people around you when you are young and energetic and live using those insights and experiences when you grow old. Planning helps you live happily to some extent though your destiny bypasses it often. Death is a full stop to a series of problems and tensions in your life. So, take it proudly and calmly when it comes to you naturally.

6. The best way to get rid of births and deaths in various life forms is to attain salvation as humans. Very few souls take birth as humans. Of them very few get a chance to meditate God. A soul can reach this spiritual status of progress after practicing meditation in various life forms as a human being. We cannot attain salvation through our realization and spiritual efforts in one lifetime. If we take birth, we need to face death. We can avoid death reaching God through salvation. We should slowly shun material attachments to enter this radiant path. It requires a lot of commitment and hard work from each of us.

7.  Atheists do not believe in the existence of God. When a series of deaths occur in their network of relationships, they may not be able to console themselves as theists. Those that believe in God attribute success and failure or sorrow and happiness in their lives to God and thus can balance their lives better than atheists. So many wonders and mysteries are there in this universe. We are all wee creatures in this cosmos. We cannot get answers to all these riddles through science and logic. Even if we check the issue of existence of God, scientifically also nothing happens without a reason. If millions of people are believing in the existence of God and His immense power on their lives, through following various cults, it means there is certainly some divine force beyond our access. Since that conscious power created this universe, it can understand our sincere worship and prayer also. If we believe in God, death cannot frighten us. He is the donor of this life and so he is the right agent to end this life according to our Karma. So, there is no place for us to think and worry about our natural death at all.

8. If we check our literature and culture, there are many comments and customs related to death. There are a number of theories, fears, imaginations and mysteries around the occurrence of death to different creatures in different ways. Through deeply analyzing those facts and events about the concept of death, we can understand the character of death in this world. Death scares us as long as we fail to understand and experience it before it really approaches us. We should explore its nature and effects when we are alive and active. Being trained extensively is necessary to face a natural phenomenon.

Some more observations and comments about death.

1.  Many casually say that they are ready to sacrifice their lives also for others. It means they are stating that they would die just like that for a cause. Mostly commercially oriented folks like shallow politicians and film stars talk such nonsense in public meetings to fool and attract their audience. In fact, for 95% of creatures in this world, the most valuable property for them is their life. They do anything to somehow live. It means the most precious element in this world is our life. It’s God’s greatest gift to us. We should not neglect, insult or sacrifice it for anything or anybody. We should struggle to live and die naturally one day, slowly or fast. We cannot decide the nature of our death. It is a surprise always.

2. Death is the biggest challenge to humanity in this world. It defeated all with a single blow only!

3. Sometimes we escape narrowly from death. It means there is still much to be experienced by us in this lifetime. Nobody can change the order of death scheduled to our life, except God and saints through their extraordinary divine powers. To understand a saint better, we should become a saint.

4. We often blame God observing premature deaths in our circle of relatives and friends. We blame Him even if He allows us to live for a long period of time also.  We blame Him either way. What a pity!

5. If death is not creating a sense of loss and pain in somebody, he might be an innocent baby, a saint, a psychopath, a mad man or a notorious criminal. Death is a great teacher. We are all students before it.

6. Nobody is actually ready to die for us. If somebody really died for us to save us from a tragedy, out of pure love for us, he or she is the greatest human being as far as our life is concerned. They must be admired by us as ones next to God. Everybody, sacrificing life for a great cause, is a star. In recorded human history, we find many such martyrs. We all owe a lot to them. We are living today because of their substantial contributions and glorious sacrifices. Their memories always chase us.

7. The pain caused in us soon after the death of a person in our close quarters is like rainwater appearing on surface of earth soon after rain. It is fresh and intense. After a period of time, it settles in the deepest parts of our subconscious mind. It keeps moving us now and then. If somebody is appearing casually and happily to us, it may not mean that there are no tragedies in his or her life. There might be a huge storehouse of pain and suffering in his or her mind also. We must spend affectionately and caringly to understand the actual lives of others better and console them if we can. Many do not share the stories of tragedies in their lives proactively as they do in case of happy events in their past. They think that others are not interested in the tragedies of their lives. Introverts are vulnerable creatures from this perspective. They do not mingle with others much. They do not speak out about their fears and sense of loss. We must become friends to such ones also and create a sense of hope in them slowly.

8. Old people, sick persons with serious illnesses and ones with many tragedies in their lives wait for death patiently. Than those who die suddenly, this kind of sufferers consider death as the greatest doctor for them. We cannot remove some tragic memories and pains from us at all despite our best efforts. Only death can end such burden of tragedies in us. So, death is a great doctor to many victims.

9. Doctors daily see different kinds of deaths in their profession. Patients consider them as visible gods and goddesses because only they can save life somehow. Doctors should accord more importance to life and suffering of the patient in their hands than money and prestige in the profession. Who fail to live ideally in this profession, take lives with various diseases and disorders later! Thus they experience pain and suffering intensely in those lifetimes. They get cheated and tortured by others in various ways. What we do today becomes our spiritual data. What we get tomorrow depends on this data. Nobody can change it. So, all of us must be careful while dealing with creatures. We build up our future always!

10. Imposed death is suicide. Soul of that creature suffers a lot after this crime. It is like escaping from the bullet of police on road and jumping into a muddy well when we don’t know how to swim. Bullet kills within seconds but imagine our suffering in a dark and muddy well after falling in it some night.

11. We bear hard life for years together patiently but fear death, which happens within seconds and resolves all our issues with a single shot. Are we not really foolish, stupid and senseless?

12. Death cannot frighten stones, sand, air, water, fire, sky and earth. They are greater than all of us!

LETTER TO GOD

Sural Jemin was getting ready to commit suicide during those early hours of the day, jumping off a peak of the Himalayas. Lord Krishna noticed his plight and came to save him. He appeared before Jemin and asked, ‘Why are you committing suicide?’ He replied, “I am completely disgusted with my life. I want to end it. My life has no purpose”. Lord Krishna told him, “Write a letter addressing me. I will answer all of them. If you are not satisfied about your existence even after reading my clarifications to your problems, you can die. I will take away that sin from your soul”. Sural agreed to this proposal and wrote the following letter addressing the God.

Dear God,

My life has been a series of issues but I would write about only eight of them. I don’t like to disturb your peace of mind with my elaborate story of pains and distress.

1. I was born ugly. My parents, relatives and everybody else considered me as an untouchable entity in course of time. I could not tolerate that revulsion and indifference from them. I started living as an orphan. I could not believe in anybody thereafter because my own creatures hated my presence. Why did you give me such beginning?

2. I continued living as a beggar at famous Hindu temples. I wondered observing the attitudes of devotees. They used to come in rich clothes and offer a lot of money and ornaments to God knowing that God does not take any of them. They never bothered about my ugly clothes or my everlasting poverty as a beggar. Even if your devotees have such low standards of thinking, who can help and save destitute creatures like me?

3. Knowing that English was being admired by millions of people in India, I picked reading material from many dustbins and improved my English skills. I read many great books and gained immense knowledge on various aspects and phenomena in this world. I felt like sharing all that invaluable knowledge with as many people as possible to awake and educate them. No school allowed me to work as a teacher. Few had interest in learning what I said. They were not interested in the power and purity of knowledge but on the look of the person delivering it. Nobody treated me as an intelligent person because I had no certificates or attractive look. Why?

4. A very beautiful and sensitive orphan loved me when I was crossing 30. I felt so possessive of her that she appeared like a Goddess to me. She died within 40 days of my association with her with cancer. I had no money to save her taking her to a hospital. I allowed her to die slowly due to my poverty and helplessness. Those memories are still haunting me. Part of the reason for my decision to die now is to get rid of those chasing memories.

5. I moved from place to place as a ticketless passenger in trains to understand human life better. Everywhere I observed selfishness and carelessness in millions of people. They were all great actors and actresses in their lives. Very few of them were living honestly, with real fear of God and sin. They had no individuality of their own. They were playing different roles to satisfy or bother others directly or indirectly. They were all absolute sinners.

6. I fell in love with nature for some time. I spent in a deep forest observing the lifestyles of a few tribes, animals and birds. Strong and intelligent heads of those tribes were cheating others. I observed the same phenomenon in animals and birds also. Most of them were living killing other creatures for their survival. I hated that environment.

7. I desired to meditate God and attain salvation after listening to the great words of a yogi. He said that this life is a shadow of my soul and so to forget about the comforts of the body and focus on the spiritual journey of my soul. I practiced meditation for some months sitting alone in a closed cave but my body got weakened slowly in this process. I stopped meditating. I concentrated on the energy of my body for survival. I had no control on my mind.

8. I spent about four years exclusively thinking about Karma of every creature. It is our asset. It chases us regularly. Our comforts and sadness are a result of our Karma. Still, we can face it and partly change it with strong will and virtues. I led my life patiently for all these years, despite many tragic turns in it. I lost that patience now. I want to end this life now and clear the burden of all these sins in my next birth. I am dying as a sage, not as an orphan.

Lord Krishna read this letter patiently. He wrote the following reply letter to him within a day.   

1. You worried about your ugliness. There are thousands of exceptionally beautiful creatures and phenomena in this universe. Some are seen by others and appreciated but they cannot understand that language of communication. They continue to live not fearing criticism or expecting appreciation from others. None of them ever thinks of their features or qualities. They never commit suicide like humans. They do not depend on others. They face heat, rain and cold of the nature without complaining to me at all. You got more intelligence and power than them to live happily among different oddities and challenges. Still why are you angry with me?

2. Ninety percent of my devotees act formal roles only. They think that they can cheat me through their gimmicks. They wear colorful clothes, get their heads tonsured for me, offer various amounts of money and gifts to satisfy me artificially. I observe their thoughts and lifestyles and laugh within myself regularly. Accepting money and little gifts from them, as a beggar, you committed more sins. They offered immoral and illegal money to you. So, you shared part of their sins, living based on the alms of those sinners. Instead of sitting at temples for food, you should have gone to government hospitals and schools. You can see many poor people there. You must have begged money and other things from them for your survival. Most of them refuse to offer you anything. If some of them are offering something to you voluntarily or after understanding your tragic life, it is morally and legally acceptable substance from them. They live more honestly than my colorful and attractive devotees at temples. Most of them never visit a temple. They neither have time nor resources to visit my artificial abodes of show, established by selfish and manipulative man. You must accept donation from the poorest of the poor only to understand me better in this material world but you chose temples to live lazily and comfortably. You lived shamelessly.

3. You learnt English and gained immense knowledge on various aspects of life and phenomena in this world but you failed to realize that knowledge is the least wanted item to materialists. They crave those things, which make their lives more and more sad, uncomfortable and sinful because it is their Karma. It does not allow them to seek and utilize easily accessible and comprehensible knowledge. You did not realize that you cannot change anybody teaching them about virtues. There are scriptures and saints in every age in some form or the other. In fact, I lived among them as an ordinary human being for many years. Even then, many of them neglected me because I was easily accessible to them. They run after futile dreams and endless fancies, not benefitting from vast resources of knowledge and directions to the path of salvation around them. They think that knowledge is useless. They are deeply attracted towards money, material assets, physical comforts and impossible ideas. You should not distribute knowledge freely to anybody because they consider it as valueless. Instead, you should have spent your life silently without bothering about educating others. You should have thought more about yourself than others. You are responsible for your destiny. Struggle to understand it. Strive to change your course of journey. You are coming alone into this world. You will leave this abode of shadows all alone. It means you are one. Change yourself first.

4. Everybody falls in love and admiration with somebody or something in this world. She died earlier than you because it was her schedule of spiritual journey. You were just a nominal role player in her series of different lifetimes and related experiences. She consoled you for some time as your beloved because you played similar role in her previous lifetime. She paid back that borrowed sense of love and care to you in this lifetime to clear her balance of attachments and burden. Dying early, she did not allow you to attach more to the account of her soul. She is relieved to that extent. You are still suffering recollecting those memories related to her because it is part of your Karma. You must realize that nothing is reliable in this world. Everything is transient. To provide you with that experience only, she spent with you for some time. It means she was the best teacher in your life. I teach my creatures in different ways but most of them fail to benefit from those lessons. They foolishly go to schools, colleges and universities thinking that there is extraordinary knowledge there from which they can gain a lot. It shows that they are devising more plans and policies to further spoil their thoughts and actions. If every educated person becomes great in this world, what is the need of temples? They know what is good or bad? Why are they committing sins and crimes despite being scholars and scientists! They indirectly teach you that they cheat themselves playing all those attractive roles out of their egos. Death is inevitable. Bear with this reality.

5. Sun shines brightly in the sky according to his scheduled duty by me. Moon is also a source of light and happiness at night. They are doing their duties. Similarly humans also take births in this world to do their duties. Before criticizing others, you must have realized that you were also a big actor in this world. You continued to live without bothering about many unfortunate creatures around you. There were men and women with various physical and mental impairments and limitations. There were thousands of animals and birds suffering with various diseases, accidents and struggle for existence in highly testing environments. You never subjected yourself to that set of difficulties and pain to understand life better but chose such ways and means which keep you unaffected. You took this form of life only because you are a sinner. You will take many lifetimes ahead because you learnt very little in this lifetime though I gave you a great opportunity this way. If you criticize or hurt somebody or something else, you will take that burden on to your soul. It means you are committing more sins unnecessarily indulging in the spiritual journeys of other sinful creatures. Great saints never come to you. You should struggle a lot to know about them. They don’t pity you even if you approach them after years of search and repentance because they are focused on their salvation. They took life only because they did not yet get salvation. When they have no time to clear their spiritual burden, how can they spend time for you? Don’t depend on others. Your Karma decides whom you should meet and how you should progress in your spiritual journey. Pray me honestly. I help you reach me fast. I don’t like or dislike anybody. I simply see how you are all playing your destined roles. My actual help is very little because I cannot erase your Karma from the account of your soul. Reform yourself.

6. Man is an intelligent creature compared to other creatures in my universe. There is no much difference between man and other creatures. Man often thinks that he can control everything around him. He seeks pleasure beating dogs, hunting beasts and exploiting helpless fellow humans. He has to pay for every sin he commits, sooner or later. Nature keeps you happy if you have to get that experience according to your Karma. The same nature impairs or kills you if you are destined to it. Scientists think of collecting and storing electricity from lightning. Cattle keepers and other innocent ones run to the shelter of trees when it is raining heavily. Some of them die due to thunderbolts falling on those trees. Lightning is the same with unique qualities. Scientists see it as a source of electricity. Laymen die due to it as part of their Karma. Nature serves you based on what you deserve but not what you desire from it. It is part of my drama. It is also playing a nominal role based on my instructions. Never criticize nature for what you lost because of it. It helps you live your Karma, nothing more than that. Man is killing fellow human beings for his pleasure or ego. Animals kill fellow animals for their survival. Which is better?

7. You can dream of anything because I equipped you with such faculty of thinking and imaginations but you can do only that which your soul is capable of. Rich people have millions of rupees and uncountable assets but how many of them are morally strong and happy? They know about their crimes and sins. On the other hand, many orphans and beggars are living patiently and happily for long despite the fact that nobody wants them in this world. A beggar learns more from his lifetime and lessens the burden of his soul than rich and comfortable people in this world. If you are facing more difficulties and pain continuously, it means your soul is progressing faster towards realization of self and salvation than others. I make you realize me through subjecting you to hardships, tragedies and sorrow. So, ask me to give you more difficulties and pain to understand me early and reach me fast. If you want to be comfortable and happy like all those rich and luxurious people around you, you have to wait thousands of years to understand and reach me. Take what is given to you. If you want and struggle for more, you will suffer later.

8. Understand that even sages have no authority to end their lives voluntarily. Your extensive knowledge or experience as a saint does not authorize you to abruptly close your destined spiritual journey. Such souls suffer without getting a chance to take another lifetime early. Suicide is a big spiritual crime. Both your birth and death should happen naturally, according to the account of your soul. Committing suicides, many enter another long path of difficulties and pain in a series of extended lifetimes. I cannot save such souls from that additional burden of lifetimes. How you are born, live and die depend on the journey of your soul. Body should not take decision about the path of soul. You should regulate your thoughts accordingly based on your knowledge about your lifetime gained through my direct and indirect instructions to you regularly in this world in various ways and forms. Hope you understood the message of my clarifications to you. Remember that spiritual knowledge is such, which cannot be explained completely through words of material world. Your soul is the right learner and teacher to you. Many things happen in this universe, which are incomprehensible and intangible to ordinary human beings.

Jemin read this reply from Lord Krishna and decided to continue his life. He withdrew from the idea of suicide.

FEATURE FILMS

Feature films are those, which last on screen or other medium of visual and audio display, from 30 minutes to three hours or more depending on the length of the content. The general characteristics of a feature film are story, dialogues, characters, shooting, artistes, technicians, producer, director, music director and so on from the perspective of a layman like me. Most of us see feature films on walls, screens, televisions and other media but very few of us know about how a film is made and released. I write about some notions and ideas I have about feature films, which I developed during the last 20 years as a passionate film viewer. My interest in feature films is so strong that I like watching a feature film almost every day if my life can afford such pleasure and comfort level. Feature films have become an inseparable part of our lives during the last 70 years or so.

The positive aspects of a film, according to my basic understanding about them:

1. I think feature film is the best offer we can get for what we are paying. They are showing more than what we deserve for what we are paying, in a limited period of time. We are buying cigarettes, liquor and so many other dangerous items to consume and spoil our health knowingly. A feature film is always better than all these items we see in our regular life. They are making us very happy from one hour to three hours showing extraordinary things on screen. They are not spoiling our health but inspiring us to live ideally and bravely. So, I think intelligent, creative and ideal people should not hesitate to watch and talk about feature films. It is the best creation of man on earth compared to any art form.

2. All viewers may not be intelligent, ideal and sensitive people but those involved in film making mostly take viewers as great ones and so struggle and suffer a lot to give the best to their regular clients. I think these are the only people in this world, who always struggle to entertain and educate others differently. This passion and mission is for novelty, creativity, innovation and inspiration. Their march is towards excellence always. They live in dreams. They desire to showcase their beautiful dreams to others like innocent children do in a park. They are dreamers of this world. They are the creative and imaginative challengers of this world. Their target audience is all healthy human beings living in their age.

3. They are so dedicated to their profession that they do not have time even to shave or sleep in much part of their career as film related creatures. They know that very few call or write to them to appreciate them. They know many talk badly about them. They know that nobody dies in this world even if they don’t make films. They are living in such sensitive and dangerous arena of human thought and culture but making wonders even in those adverse conditions around them. It means they always think about what they are giving to others, not minding what they are getting back from their efforts. There is no surety that every feature film would be a success at cinemas. Many filmmakers know about this bitter truth but they are still continuing in this path of hardships, fears and challenges. Their business is entertaining others. Many times, viewers disappoint them not seeing films just out of their stupidity, innocence or eccentricity. Producers suffer silently but never shoot any set of viewers for their sin. It means they are more patient and ideal than all of us. They invest a lot believing in the goodness and tastes of thousands of idiots, rogues and lunatics and end up as paupers in many cases. What a pity in this world as far as feature films are concerned. They are interested to entertain me differently. I am neglecting them for no particular reason. They are able to live depending on such nasty rogues also!

4. Actors and actresses struggle and suffer a lot in the making of a film. Though director is the captain of the ship of a film, coordinating different aspects of filmmaking, even different role players should have all those natural or trained talents to act as per the instructions of the creative and challenging directors. Acting is not as easy as we think. It is smiling when we are suffering inside. It is crying when we are laughing inside actually. It is hiding intuitions and passions and exhibiting exactly what the director wants and viewers expect from them. It is like toiling for a year or so in the sun and rain for the claps and appreciation of a few folks from millions of careless and insensitive viewers at large. Many boys may not get beautiful girls to marry. Many girls do not get handsome guys to spend time with. There are many demerits and drawbacks in our personal and professional lives. Actors and actresses are satisfying those basic instincts in us indirectly. Our neighbor does not allow us to see his beautiful wife or daughter because she is his exclusive property. All of us strongly desire to see beauties and talk with them but we don’t get those chances in our lives. Actors and actresses are showing their beauty and good looks for all of us. To that extent, are we not satisfying our hidden desires to a great degree? For example: Some of the actresses I like for their impressive beauty are: Manisha Koirala, Hema Malini, Meenakshi Seshadri, Meera Jasmin, Anushka Shetty and so on. I don’t like many watching crazily at my wife in public places but I am watching the beauty of all these actresses on screens like a passionate admirer of beauty. Are they not ideal than me or my wife. Most of us think that some beauties exclusively belong to us only and we cannot bear if others look at them. Actors and actresses desire to entertain and educate their viewers exhibiting their bodies and acting talents also to the most possible extent. They are more idealists than all of us from this perspective. They are living and acting to entertain all of us but we are living for our limited circle of dependents, relatives and friends only. They are my masters always to learn something or the other from them. I salute all those dreamers, visionaries and thinkers.

5. Most of us develop some wrong notions about a few directors, actors and actresses. Example A: R Narayana Murthy always directs such films in Telugu, which portray the lifestyles and issues of common people. Some of my friends and relatives do not like watching his films when there is another film in the cinema nearby. It means R Narayana Murthy is not a wrong person struggling to discuss the issues of the poor and the downtrodden but those, who are not interested to see and understand their problems on screen also. They are the criminals and sinners of this world to that extent. They don’t want to know about the filth and pain around them, which is being created and sustained because of them only in this world. Example B:  Some consider some actresses and actors as bad ones because they portray bad roles in many films. Female and male villains, prostitute role players, body show dancers are just a few roles of this order. They are playing those roles because we are interested to watch them so but not because they have such qualities in their real lives. It implies that we, the viewers, are real criminals and sinners because we like a heroine being raped passionately by a villain than a male teacher and male student talking about ideals in a classroom scene. It means they are making films minding our interests and fancies but not focusing their attention on UFOs. They write stories and dialogues gaining insights from the lives and professions of contemporary people but not machines and forests. It means they are studying societies and cultures more than all of us. As such, they are great scholars and critics.

6. Most of us criticize almost every feature film, pointing out some error in it. I heard many saying that first half is good or second half is bad. How many of our lives and professions are perfectly interesting and inspiring from date of birth to date of death? Highly touching and inspiring moments can be a few only even in the lives of extraordinary artists, thinkers, scientists, celebrities, social reformers, dreamers and challengers. It means none of us is a wonder. Even God is unable to make each minute in our life splendid and remarkable. Then, how can a man, a small creature created by God, for some purposes, always make classic films or 100% absorbing scenes in every film? Ninety-five percent of the viewers, who criticize films, filmmakers, artistes and technicians, for some or other reason, regularly, publicly or privately, are, in fact, indecent, insensitive, eccentric and mentally sick idiots of our times. I cannot write a dialogue, a lyric, compose music, direct a song, shoot part of a scene, act a small role also in a film…these are all my weaknesses and demerits as a human being. Those, who are entertaining me acting in a feature film, are always greater and superior to me from this perspective. It means I should admire and appreciate them for what they are in comparison to me. This is what I do and feel when watching any film on a television or in a cinema. I imagine myself as an innocent school kid going to a park of stars and wonders, which I cannot do in my real life, and so I passionately watch almost every feature film, unless it is too boring to watch continuously. I am thinking and behaving like a sensible filmgoer because I have the qualities of self-awareness, self-assessment and self-criticism. Anybody can enjoy watching a feature film if he or she has these qualities. You should not criticize others unless you are greater than them in many respects. How many of you are assessing your standards and values from this perspective before talking badly about a film, actor, actress, director, musician or producer? This is why this world is so; idiots and rogues talking nonsense about challengers publicly or privately. I think we do much of it aiming at film folks but not others. Can I ever dance like Prabhu Deva? Can I ever direct a feature film like Satyajit Ray, K Bala Chander or K Viswanath? Can I ever sing like S P Bala Subrahmanyam, Shreya Goshal, Chitra or Lata Mangeshkar?  Can I ever create music like Ilaya Raja or A R Rehman? It means I am nothing in comparison to them in this set of different talents possessed and exhibited by them over the years. They are all doing it to entertain me or you. They are serving us substantially every single day or night, directly or indirectly. Are they not real social servants? Everybody can see those extraordinary films. Everybody can listen to those classic songs anywhere? Are we spending thousands of rupees and years to buy or enjoy them? We are spending a little money only. In fact, we are not paying anything to them in most of the cases. How many melodious songs are we listening to from All India Radio channels and public and private television channels without paying anything to them? Are not these artists and dreamers the admirable assets and challengers of our age? They have no discrimination. A prostitute, a criminal, a scientist, a prisoner, a dirty politician…anybody can enjoy the bliss of listening to those songs and watching those films. Feature films are like moonlight, which is available to us on 365 days and nights, almost freely. Whether to benefit from that vast and inspiring moonlight or not is left to your discretion. I am deriving the best possible benefits from feature films! I am able to remain as the best consumer only in terms of watching and enjoying feature films.

7. The culture of a nation can be assessed based on how most of its citizens are getting some useful or pleasant thing from others? Are they grabbing it secretly or using it properly as per the established system of laws and morals? Piracy means stealing the property of others illegally and immorally. This is what millions of Indians are doing now across places. It is like raping every beautiful girl visible to us, be it in our family circles, neighborhood or anywhere. It is never wrong if you spend 1000 rupees and have that joy with a professional prostitute. It must be her chosen profession, but not imposed one on her due to her poverty or other adverse conditions around her. You can do the same with any creature provided he or she does have similar feelings and notions like you for that short period of time. What about considering every beauty as your desired object and so grabbing it! Do you remain silent and neutral if your sister, cousin or mother is in that situation due to the thoughts and activities of a rogue in your part of living? If you don’t like it, you should not like to watch a pirated film also. At personal level, I never like to watch a piracy film, though I could not strictly follow this self-imposed guideline regarding film songs. They are available everywhere. They copy immensely at audio stores. I forgot what is legal or illegal in this world regarding getting and using music for my pleasure. No government is implementing stringent rules in this domain. I am able to see many films and listen to songs without paying anything for them at all. I have such environment in India. Do I buy moonlight when moon is giving it freely to me? The same is the case for music and feature films in India now in most of the cases. Very few are going to cinemas, audio and video stores to buy original music CDs and DVDs due to this clumsy environment in India. I scold if any idiot brings a pirated copy of film and tries to play it on my computer screen. I consider it as a crime and sin. I can buy DVDs. They cost very little. If I cannot buy them, I can watch them on television and listen to them on radio. If I cannot buy a television or radio, I must go to the house of a fellow familiar to me and do it there. If I cannot do it also, I should go to a forest and meditate God for making my life that much ideal and solitary but I should not see pirated copies anywhere. I made it a rule in my life to give a certificate of character to myself, which is superior to any other certificates issued by shallow idiots in this world. How many of you are living honestly and ideally to satisfy the commands of your conscience? God assesses your value based on those certificates but not your material achievements. If you want such certificate, you should not use any item illegally and immorally. We can grab anything when we are at the verge of death or disaster to save ourselves or others. We can commit a mistake or blunder if it saves our life or many of others in a context. In all other times of our life, we have no moral authority to grab anything from others and enjoy it.

8. Feature films are like divine dreams for me. I consider my dreams and feature films almost as one kind of items familiar to me. I derive bliss from both almost alike. Dream is a creation of God or my mind and a feature film is a creation of many challengers and idealists in this world. I owe to every artiste, technician, producer and cinema owner in my familiar world because he or she is showing me a piece of worth of 10-100 crore rupees for 50-300 rupees. Are they not stars of this world selling their highly valuable products that cheaply to everybody in every imaginable place? If I buy a DVD of a feature film, how many folks can watch it on my computer for any number of days and nights? It means I am deriving uncountable amount of benefits and happiness spending 30 or 50 rupees once. I am getting such joy and benefits from nature and God only, after feature films. This is the value I accord to feature films and those artistes and technicians in my life. Even my parents, siblings, well-wishers have no such concern for me. They are living for themselves most of their lifetimes but these artistes are always struggling and suffering to entertain and educate me. They are admirable challengers of extraordinary thoughts and their presentation. This is why I consider ‘feature film’ the greatest invention of the modern times. It is making millions of lives happy and dreamy. When you are in difficulties, watch a feature film, which shows life as a dream of beauty and excellence. When you are very happy, you must watch a set of tragedies. Feature films educate you immensely if you are ready to change yourself. They can never change you if you think that they are creations of ordinary people and there is nothing to learn from them. You call God also dog if you are essentially a wrong person. You can see God in a dog also if you are fundamentally a sage in thoughts and actions. So, what you get from feature films depends on what you are basically and what you want to become in course of time. Personally, I like watching every kind of film because they made it for me, an innocent and helpless human being, who continuously struggles to benefit from what is created by others after a lot of hard work and suffering. In short, they are making films to satisfy highly selfish and unreliable blokes like me. I watch a film for my pleasure but not to make a producer rich. I may make him rich spending a little money at my end and so a producer is always a loser in this game. I am cheating him or her every time I watch a feature film anywhere because I am buying a product of 1000 rupees for one rupee always. I am an intelligent but narrow-minded businessman in this arena always and nobody is giving me such chance in any other field. I am buying very useless and harmful products from many idiots regularly at high prices, clearly knowing that he or she is publicly cheating me. Are not filmmakers, artistes and technicians idealists from this perspective, who never cheat anybody? I love all of them though I cannot write about them because of various mind and time related constraints. So, the greatest favor I can do for the creators of these feature films is simply to watch as many of them as possible. My mother may prepare a curry extraordinarily or very ordinarily for me based on her skills but the fact is she made it out of pure love for me. I should eat it unless it is very bad, which cannot be put on my tongue at all. Her love for me is greater than the taste of the curry. Her love is immeasurable and invaluable. The taste of curry is very ordinary and negligible idea. Similarly, every feature film may not be extraordinary. Still, I must be watching every film because the creators of feature films are like my mother. My mother prepares 10 kinds of curries and 10 kinds of soups only always for me. But, these mothers are making hundreds of varieties of curries and soups for me regularly. Their love and contribution to my life is just like that of my mother for me in my lifetime or even more than that when considered critically. So, a feature film is like food served to my senses. If I don’t consume it, it’s like insulting the love and care of my mother. Feature films are sources of bliss and inspiration for me. I can never think and make such classic films. So, I had better watch them regularly.

There are some disadvantages and negative comments about feature films. I discuss some of them.

I heard a lot about the immorality prevalent in film industry. Generally, most of us, based on the portrayal of characters powerfully and ideally in films, consider actors and actresses as extraordinary human beings. They play roles of deities, challengers and social reformers. Many viewers admire film personalities. There are many fan clubs across India. However, the widely available negative talk about film industry is:

A. Females get exploited physically and mentally in course of their struggle to establish themselves as actresses and in retaining those positions thereafter because of many immoral producers, directors, music directors, character artistes, financiers, distributors and so many other participants related to film industry. I heard many saying that a film actress has to become a prostitute in her journey as an actress, at some or all levels. Some artistes, exploiting another artiste, this way, is sinful and inhuman.

B. Mostly we observe that the son, daughter or a relative of the present actor or actress only becomes another actor or actress. It means there is no much recognition and appreciation for fresh talent in film industry. They promote their or their chosen creatures artificially. If we see somebody many times on screen, we manage to love him or her in course of time. This is how many are becoming stars now. It’s really pity because filmmakers, who talk a lot about standards and values in films, through dialogues and character presentation, are really failing to practice those morals in their lives.

C.  Ghost writers are there in film industry. I write story, lyrics and compose music also but my name does not appear on screen. They pay me some money and write their names as producers of their creative pieces. This is why many doubt whether one really wrote a song or not. Originally talented ones don’t get due credit because of this ugly trend in film industry. It’s a mess made by them.

D. I often hear about creative folks roaming about film production areas with bundles of stories and creative talent, looking for somebody to recognize and appreciate their talent. Why are they remaining on roads always? Because in film industry, it is not talent and hard work that are recognized often, but your dirty politics of meeting somebody for something and doing nasty things to get into a filmmaking process somehow. Born artists have to depend on trained artistes to promote themselves. It means, once a fellow becomes famous in film industry, he starts looking down upon other folks with similar talents. Some are paid in lakhs for a story and some are not paid at all. There are many stories about the filth in film industry about such immorality and illegality. They think nobody knows about it! 

E. Many idiots are also making feature films now thinking about the salability of their product somehow but not about the real worth of their films and what they are genuinely giving to the viewers. If shallow rogues make films, it directly or indirectly brings a bad image to the entire film industry.

F. Recently I noted that high budget films are being released in a number of cinemas but low budget ones are remaining in labs or dustbins forever. Some financially and politically strong producers, directors and distributors have made the release of films into a big issue, controlling the ownership or long lease status of many cinemas in this nation. It’s a kind of cruel monopoly wherein small budget and innocent film producers fail to bring their films into limelight. Talent suppressed is injustice to the core.

G. Most of the film actors and actresses are not accessible to viewers at their homes, shooting spots or other public places. They try to remain as inaccessible gods and goddesses to ordinary folks. Once I went to the house of Akkineni Nagarjuna in Hyderabad to see him but his security guard considered me like a stray dog and drove me away. He created a wrong impression in me about the entire range of film artistes with this gesture of insensitive rejection. I understood that film actors and actresses cannot be as accessible as me because they are not leading honest and brave lives like me. Some may believe that they are stars, extremely busy and so do not have time to meet folks like me. It is a wrong statement. I am also very busy in my life but I am creating time to see a film. It means I have passion for art. At the house of Nagarjuna, that day, I played the role of an art lover. Every artist must create time to meet and please art lovers. If they don’t do so, they are not really artists. They are professionals only. I consider such shallow professionals less worthy than dogs and donkeys. Dogs and donkeys look at me when I make a little sound aiming at them, angrily or happily. If professionals have no even such responsive nature, I had better admire dogs and donkeys instead of these shallow and nasty professionals.

H: Many noted actors and actresses are worse than dogs and bitches in their real lives. We somehow come to know about them. Once we develop aversion for them, we treat all actors and actresses alike. We propagate these ideas among all. Thereafter really talented ones fear to tread this path. This is why there are talent hunt events in film industry now. If you respect one that comes to your office or studio looking for a chance, you need not shout on roads for fresh talent. You should respect the available talent at your doorstep instead of knocking at other doors later, who do not like your presence at all.

Most of us know a lot about some actors, actresses, directors and producers only but not about hundreds of other artistes and technicians who toil a lot in making a film. It means, in film industry, everybody does not get due credit for what he or she does. Only some are getting the credit. It is the biggest drawback of the film industry. We all see the hero and heroine dancing but what about others dancing around them? We all see extraordinary dancers only but not those excellent choreographers. 

We feel spellbound and highly inspired listening to many dialogues and songs in some films but how many of us know much about those dialogue writers, musicians and lyric writers. Now they are getting focused due to shows on televisions and other platforms but many are still remaining behind the screen. Is it not absolute immorality, one or two getting great name, for the hard work and creative talent invested by those, who remain behind the stage? When do we see their faces and appreciate them? 

We love art pieces and artists but not their personal lives. If an actor became very famous in a period of 50 years, it means he neglected much of his personal life during all those years. They did not sleep with their wives adequate number of nights, they did not play with their sons and daughters, they did not personally supervise their growth as children…so many failures as fathers, mothers, sons and daughters. So, a great star is one, who tortured his real folks a lot in his lifetime without being accessible and reliable to them when they needed him or her badly. They earned 100 % fame, committing 50% crimes and sins! Perhaps this must be the background of every person that worked for others always!

I hear a lot about wrong people in film industry getting awards from the governments and many cultural organizations. I heard that many struggle a lot to get awards and recognition immorally and illegally. The fact is I love anybody based on what he or she delivered in his or her films rather than what award he or she got from an agency. I developed this opinion over time because I knew that awards are not being given to really talented artistes always. For example: Late Telugu film song writer Veturi Sundara Rama Murthy got a national award for a Telugu song starting with ‘Raali Poye Puvvaa Neeku Raagaalendhuke” in feature film Maathru Devobhava. In fact, he wrote hundreds of extraordinary songs for many other Telugu films as well in his long classic career in film industry. This Telugu song is almost nothing when compared to those masterpieces, which this master of songs created for years in Telugu film industry. So, this award for this song has very little value in my consideration. Similarly, Sirivennela Sita Rama Sastry wrote masterpieces for the Telugu films like Sirivennela and Swarna Kamalam. I presume he wrote all other songs to give bonus to Telugu film viewers after paying this main salary for their lifetimes. So, Sirivennela is competitor to himself because he could write classic songs for some films only but not for all. So, I can know the value of this challenging lyric writer listening to his songs, if I have a bit of taste and passion for Telugu film songs. In this context, I don’t place any importance on any award given to this extraordinary lyricist because I gave him a great certificate before other idiots recognized him. So, ultimately, an artist’s life can be considered successful, remarkable and blissful only when his target audience recognize and appreciate him in their hearts and public places voluntarily. Anantha Sriram, who looks like an innocent and ignorant college student, is writing highly touching and inspiring songs. I already gave him many certificates in my heart after listening to his songs. Why should he be bothered about dirty and nasty governments giving awards to him in this context? There are many such great lyric writers, singers, musicians, directors and producers in the film industry now. I love and admire all of them though I can’t put all their names on paper. It means I am unable to document everything hidden in my heart. What I write is a little of what I think and know but there are hundreds of other records in my brain. I keep in love with them always. This is what every viewer and listener feels about different artistes and technicians in film industry. So, for me, awards are like waste papers and donations given to artistes because it is a formality. I know about talent. I know how to recognize masters of art.   

At many cinemas, tickets are being sold in black at unbelievably high prices. I witnessed this heinous crime about 10 times in many cinemas when I went to see some interesting films. I avoided seeing some films just not to buy a ticket in black. Those, who are talking a lot about measures to arrest piracy and other malpractices by viewers, in general, must discuss black ticket issue also. If every viewer can see a feature film in any cinema paying the fixed price only, they generally develop good impression about films and cinemas and avoid becoming rogues at their level. Then, in almost every cinema, the owners of cinemas sell eatables and drinks at high prices to loot viewers. This is a crime about which no film producer is talking. Before talking about the dirtiness of the bottoms of viewers, producers and directors should wash their bottoms also thoroughly. Never think that your dirt does not smell widely!

I am upset and embarrassed observing the measures being taken by many film folks to promote their films. If an hotelier starts giving costly chocolates for some days to attract different folks to his hotel for having their meals, in course of time, they hate that hotel if he does not give those chocolates as bonus before the meal. If you give chicken only to your dog for some days out of your excess love for it initially, it looks for it thereafter also even after you become a pauper because you habituated it to that extent. The mistake is not dog’s, but yours. Similarly, every sensible idiot comes to see a film in a cinema even if you do not go to their house and sleep with them for a night before the release of your film. They are going to hotels because they need food. They go to cinemas if they really have passion for films. You need not push them to do so. You had better focus on making good films instead of on the matter of bringing brainless rogues to cinemas through your monkey acts in public places and otherwise. Then there won’t be difference between an actor and a monkey player. Both are on roads no to promote their worth and attract audience. I think excessive spending on the promotion of a film is like extraordinary spray of scent on your clothes instead of taking a simple bath. Concentrate on the basics of a film but not on the gimmicks of promoting it. If there is dust only in your film, and if many viewers came to cinema expecting a lot from it based on what you showed and did in your promotion process, slowly they realize that your films are also nonsense and so you are doing much fuss on roads. An intelligent and dedicated viewer may be fooled once or twice by your promotion tactics and once he stamps you and your films as dirt, you can never change his mind. Let him remain as a sensible man!

It is unfortunate that film stars are admired when acting in films and forgotten soon if they stop appearing on screen. Many artistes are dying pathetically after living happily and richly for a limited period of time. Viewers have concern for only those, who are appearing on screen now, attractively. It means their tastes and preferences for artists and art pieces are transitory and unreliable. Shortly, they are senseless rogues. Actors and actresses should not get into unbearable risks to satisfy them in the form of risky dances and fights and other fatal scenes. Viewers are like crazy monkeys. Their interests do not remain the same always. Don’t try to please them going extra mile. You suffer from three months to two years to make a film but many nasty viewers spread bad talk about your classic film within hours after release of it just like that. It means those, who are coming to see your film on the first or second day of its release itself, are the real villains to your film. They talk nonsense based on their volatile impressions about your film. They are not intellectuals, critics or highly admirable viewers of your circle but rogues to the core. Really talented artists do not consider your film worthless because they know the worth of art. If somebody is reacting over-enthusiastically soon after seeing your film somewhere, he or she is a nut. Do you want to treat yourself great or bad based on their comments, I mean those of your brainless fans? Every financially successful film may not be a classic piece but every classic piece gets a place in the history of film industry. Your concern must be to make a great film with elements to attract large base of audience but not a few rogues and nuts on those three or four days. You may act in 100 feature films but audience remember only some of them because they are only classic pieces. Decide what kind of actor or actress you want to be and thus your real contribution to film industry. Makeup lasts for days. Your original beauty lives for years. Depend on your real worth.

How do ordinary people talk about film actors and actresses in their private lives? How do they react when a film actress comes across them a day or night all alone? They talk a lot of nonsense about them thinking that they are immoral creatures to the core. This is a paradox. They admire them when they are inaccessible to them and consider them as low standard creatures when they appear to them without their effort. So, actors and actresses should realize that most of their admirers have very low standards and values as individuals. They need not worry much based on their applause or criticism because essentially they are rogues. If an ordinary film is becoming a massive hit and an extraordinary film is turning out to be an utter failure, this is all because of these low standards of most of the viewers. Doing your best is your role as far as a film is concerned. The reaction of viewers at cinemas may not be a reliable source for you to appreciate or criticize yourself for your earlier decision to act in that film. Nature does not produce intellectuals and dreamers profusely but decisively. It creates 10 challengers to decide and lead the lives of 10,000 people. Nowadays, only four or five of those few challengers only are coming out to lead people and the remaining are staying back being disgusted and disappointed with the contemporary culture and trends. In these bleak times of evolution of human beings from narrow to narrower, really talented and cultured film artistes may not be recognized and admired by all, instantly or even later. You know about your talent. A few worthy folks of your circle also know about you. They readily help and appreciate you. Be satisfied with it. Do not crave applause from millions of rogues. Be content with a few words of praise from one or two challengers of your industry. Even they may not appreciate you for lack of time. You are the best judge of your talent. Give a certificate to yourself.

There is still a lot to write about films and those related with film industry because I have such experiences and knowledge about this arena based on my passion for it. I would answer if there are any questions and doubts based on what I wrote above. Every layman has something to say. This is it.

My love for feature films continues as long as there are artists and art in this world.

I did not mention the names of many film artistes whom I love deeply for what they did in this field so far. It is a long list and so avoided it. The fact is we can represent only a fraction of our heart and mind in a visible form and the rest remains in us as a storehouse of memories.