PERSONAL SECRETARY

On 1 February, 2009, the following ad appeared in a famous Indian English daily called Nightingale.

Sarolini Vihasini, the princess of an erstwhile Indian kingdom, seeking self-imposed refuge in a deep forest of India, among haughty and naughty male servants, with lack of manners suitable to satisfy the interests and fancies of a princess, intends to recruit a female personal secretary with the following criteria.

Qualification

She may be a postgraduate in any branch of institutionalized human learning situated in India or abroad. Fluency in English and Hindi and any other one Indian language is mandatory.

Features

Considerably ordinary girl in physical appearance.

Qualities

High tendency of servitude, unbending loyalty to the master, preference to live and work always in a forest where unfamiliar human presence is zero, lack of interest in her life or others' lives outside who are closely or distantly associated with her, ability to manage on her own during times of dangers and unexpected natural calamities, good learner, bad teacher, partly trained in minimum medical care, fully self-tuned spiritualist, naturist, nature lover, swimmer, tree climber, go-getter and one with strength and motivation to face the odd men at any given point of her time in my association.

Remuneration

Rs.2, 00,000 per month along with many other benefits and perks.

Response

One educated, beautiful and modern Indian girl named Mohasini went to her place in the forest one morning after one month after the appearance of this ad in that daily, and told her bravely, "Your Highness! Thanks for your ad in that daily. I have two options before you. I have a truck with a load of robots specially ordered, manufactured and imported from Japan for your purpose. They are about ten in number. They meet the agenda of your requirements of your desired female personal secretary. The monthly rent for all those robots is two lacs. You must deposit it into my bank account regularly as long as you use the services of those automated machines.

The second option is my advice to you to marry some crazy Indian modern boy. You think the girls and women in India with lots of money are happy because of their money and assets? No. It is because of the madness and liveliness they enjoy in the company of their lovers, admirers or husbands. You are such a magnetic beauty of India. If you simply walk in some part of India, some boy would certainly start following you to make you fall in love with him soon. Thereafter you would understand what it means to be born and live in India today. Those were the days of darkness and loneliness and humiliation to women in closed quarters managed by self-centered and eccentric men. These are the days of women. Liberty is their choice. Happiness is their asset. Success is their address. You must come out of this forest now. I will be back to you after one week's time. Decide fast and let me know your choice. Till then, keep this truck with you only".

After one month, when Mohasini went to her again, Vihasini told her, "I asked all those men to leave me forever. I will come out with you. Help me fall in love with a handsome and good guy or vice versa. Keep all this money, gold coins and other invaluable goods with you. I don't know how to keep them with me. I want only love and care in my life by a good boy. Please help me".

Mohasini replied, "I will take care of that riches for your sake until you can manage them on your own. I don't want them at all. I will be with you until you find a good match for you. Unfortunately I am also in the same position now. We need two suitable boys for us".