March 4, 2010

GROUP DISCUSSION



Sonia: I welcome you all to this special general body meeting. Mr. Manmohan what’s your take on present India?

Manmohan: I stopped applying my skills and values in ruling this country the moment I accepted your leadership and control upon me. In Indian politics, party high command is the supreme authority on anything. This is your country. All the political parties working with us are happy with our portfolio and resource distribution system. I am just a nominal role player here. You know better than me about India. I can simply say that it is the best democracy in the world. I read it somewhere in a book in my childhood. I am happy with that statement. Rest is history. You built it. You are maintaining it. We are your loyal servants.

Sonia: Mr. Rahul. How are you?

Rahul: India is ours. Nehru, Indira Gandhi, Rajiv Gandhi, Sonia Gandhi and then Rahul Gandhi. I am moving from place to place in India to understand it more than you. As a leader of Congress party, you are suffering a lot to rule this country. I can’t burden you to take me on tours to interior India for my personal research. I am handling it on my own now. Karuna Nidhi made his son Deputy Chief Minister warning others that he must be their next Chief Minister. If a politician has a son or daughter, they rule their regions after their death or voluntary retirement. Educated youth spend watching cricket, poor people spend their time working hard for their basic amenities, employees are happy with their jobs and unions, other fools enjoy themselves watching films and going to clubs and pubs. We must create and run different evil attractions to every segment of people in this country so that they never think about the real issues of this nation. Then it is easy to rule this country. You can make anybody the President of this nation based on their blind loyalty to our Congress party. By this I mean Nehru family and his heirs. Keep working hard to present me as the next Prime Minister of this country. I play my role to attract crazy and worthless youth in colleges and poor people in huts.

Sonia: Mr. Chidambaram! How is law and order scenario in India?

Chidambaram: I owe you a lot for bringing me into this cool portfolio madam. I toiled much as a finance minister earlier. I am working hard to curb naxalism in this country. We should kill them brutally investing any amount of money. We can’t curb corrupt and unethical people in this country because they are the supporters and guides of our historical party after independence. Let us encourage celebrities like Indra Nooyi, Sachin Tendulkar and Vijay Mallya. Pepsi and Coca Cola companies sell useless drinks to Indians. They drink them a lot because they are basically sheep. They do anything if it is a fashion. They don’t question anything. Sachin Tendulkar spoils crazy Indians to a great extent. They spend watching cricket because it does not expect them to think or worry about anything happening in this country now. Then our crazy boy Vijay produces alcoholic drinks and releases his spectacular calendar every year. Madam, is it not a comedy that millions of Indians enjoy smoking, chewing, drinking and talking about nonsense always. We are earning hugely making them drunkards, smokers and pimps. I admit that some suffer and many die in this business but rich are happy to that extent. If we supply more condoms freely, anybody can go to anybody and do whatever they like with them. Sex is a basic instinct. We must not ask Indians to sleep with their life partners only. Let them sleep with anybody. We must encourage it. For that matter, what are our politicians, businessmen and celebrities doing now? Some go abroad and many do it here only. Excessive easy money and leisure make many things. They enjoy at personal level using these methods and teach values to others in campaigns and guest lectures. The other day we sent Mr. Prasad to teach lessons to management students also. We must teach Indians how to earn a lot of money and then spend it in any way they like. I mean we must make sheep from people and keep them so forever. If they start thinking about India, we can’t sit here comfortably. Naxals are not at all an issue for us. Forget it madam. If we uproot them from this soil, then every politician, celebrity and businessmen can earn in billions and save more in foreign banks. India is essentially a poor country. If it becomes a developed country, then Obama, World Bank and other people and institutions do not lend us money. A beggar only can ask for money from a rich fellow. I am happy to see India as a poor country forever. What a fun madam!

Sonia: Ms. Mamata Banerjee, are you doing well?

Mamata: I would take all lucrative railway projects to my home state West Bengal only. I have soon elections there. Jyothi Basu ruined our state for decades. I should grab political power from those old-fashioned leftists this time at any cost. I know that I am a central minister. In my homemade dictionary it means “an authority to develop my state”. Which minister in our cabinet has guts to question my moves in this regard? The fact is ministers work here for their benefits and to develop their states minding their local politics. Who is bothered about India now? Many send me reports and applications begging me to allocate funds and projects to their states also. I can’t think about anything in this nation until I become the Chief Minister of West Bengal. I am a leader of masses. I wear simple dresses and lead a simple life unlike many politicians in this nation. Don’t you compare me with Mahatma Gandhi? Bengalis are also Indians. If my state develops, it is the development of India also. Don’t worry about me. I never take any measure to develop this nation equally and justifiably. It is not in the minds of our politicians. Our policy is divide and rule. Since the white people spent more time in our state, I practice this principle more effectively. If we develop some states only more, others move to that place. It facilitates cultural exchange. If we serve the same kind of costly food to all, nobody finds it interesting to eat. We must throw a little here and there. They quarrel among themselves and we can play our leader roles there happily. Indians must suffer always. Only then women like me also can become cabinet ministers. For your information, that is the history of 90% of MPs and ministers in our Parliament. Let’s continue this tradition. As our honorable PM says often in other countries, India is the best democracy in the world. Here any Tom or Dick or Lucy can become any minister or leader. You are the captain of our ship. Should I educate you more on this old subject? Where there are fools, there are brainless leaders.

Sonia: Mr. Pranab Mukherjee, what do you say about her views and remarks?

Pranab: She is a born leader. I can say nothing about her great views and ideals meant for the development of this nation. I worked hard to make up and present our budget recently. Stealing money wisely and strategically from the voiceless and distributing it to all equally is our policy now. I never say that we can eradicate poverty from India. Should we kill every poor fellow or what to do it? Then who work as laborers in this wretched country. Poverty is the asset of a nation. Our beggars sit at our temples and at any other place where some people come for some noticeable work. Their abject appearance makes every comfortable Indian realize that India is really a poor country even to this date. If they don’t see beggars or sufferers anywhere in this nation, they further get spoilt. They drink more and celebrate more with Pepsi, Coca Cola, Kurkure and such other useless foods in restaurants and hotels. Daily show of poverty before us alerts us to be careful about our future. So, I ensure that this country remains a poor nation forever through my strategic and visionary budget preparation and resource allocation. Don’t worry about all those routine matters. I promise you that I will take every step to see that your son only becomes the Prime Minister of this nation in 2014 elections. All our cabinet ministers work hard for it as long as you do not interfere in our regional politics and measures we take minding those domestic affairs. Rahul is a visionary, intellectual and idealist. India badly needs his guidance now. Shall we collapse our government now and go for mid-term show madam. I mean why more delay? He is already overly matured!

Sonia: Thank you for your enthusiasm! I have some more things to share with you before concluding this session. You must understand and practice them without fail. A stitch in time saves nine. I want every state in India!

Rahul: Mummy, can I go out now. I have to sleep in a hut in Uttar Pradesh today to make them believe that I am also one of them. Is that ok for you?

Sonia: Certainly my darling. Take your sister also. Her appearance can work wonders there. I mean who knows? Everything is possible in this nation. We just need to know how to mobilize people and manage our affairs secretly before making our public appearance. I mean you know what India means and how our family members sacrificed their comforts and lives for this nation for decades. You think I did not become the Prime Minister of this nation because I am a fool! Anyway our cool and silent Manmohan Singhji is there to rule this country on our behalf. Why should we take up that trash on to our head? It earns pity from our loyal fellows in the party and people also. I mean in India we need to rule others earning their pity through our tactics but not honestly and decently. Go ahead my son. There is nothing here for you to learn any more. You are a born leader like Mamtaji! I will send you to Lalooji if you need more lessons about India.

Chidambaram: Madam, we are waiting for your valuable conclusive dialogues.

Sonia: Remember that we sit in our comfortable positions as long as 95% of Indians are distracted from politics and involved in nonsensical and evil avenues of self-destruction or self-control. They should understand that corruption and unrest are part of India and the lives of Indians. Do not take any strong actions against corrupt bureaucrats or businessmen. Let them earn handsomely and keep their money wherever they like. If at all a day comes in future, when the government has to bring back all that black money from the Swiss banks, our wise creatures already smell that news and take away that money from there. When everybody is corrupt, nobody needs to worry to save them from these formal attacks and recovery scenes. Ensure that more and more money is distributed to poor Indians and that they remain daily laborers always. They must get 100 days compulsory work in their regions through this scheme. When they are engaged in something, they don’t think much about other things. If we devise such schemes and policies, which develop India instantly and where every Indian lives happily, then who comes to our useless meetings? We already started spending crores of rupees to bring brainless sheep to our huge and showy meetings in many parts of India before and after elections and on such other occasions. Nobody comes to our meetings if they have enough money with them to buy water packets, biryani parcels and such other small gifts. Where there is an acute need, there is suffering and craving for it. We have money. They have poverty. This friction works wonders. We steal their money strategically and sit in comfortable seats here. Now and then we throw a little of it back to them to further misguide and ruin them. Are we social reformers and intellectuals or what to develop this nation? Our interests and priorities are important for us here. Check the case of Jaya Prakash Narayan in Andhra Pradesh? He left his lucrative collector job and joined the mess of social reformation years ago to change and develop his people. What happened during the recent elections? Only he could win his seat in Kukatpally area. I did not inform our Congress people to grab that seat also for courtesy sake. He is on roads and in slums for years. Let him enjoy that position a little. Telugu people taught him a lesson that they are not ready to be reformed at all. They are happy with their corrupt and immoral politicians. They are basically sheep. They don’t worry about anything except their crazy personal lives and daily enjoyment in some way. Discussing local politics, watching films, listening to FM radios, reading newspapers, staring at showy celebrities and rich politicians are their hobbies. People like Jaya Prakash suffer immensely in this nation because Indians are essentially sheep. They never think broadly and plan to develop India. If they had thought and behaved so, I would have moved to Italy years ago. What is there in India which one can’t find in Italy? I am here to enjoy this daily live drama centered on poor people and rich ones exploiting them publicly. Where there are more fools and buffoons, there anybody can become a leader. Is it possible in Italy or the US? Educated people question their leaders and keep their politics a little sensible and meaningful. Uneducated and foolish people like Indians welcome villains to guide them for courtesy sake. They don’t question others because they depend on Karma theory. It is their fate that I should head this nation sitting in this thrown. It is their fate that Rahul Gandhi becomes the next Prime Minister of this nation. Any way Mr. Manmohan can’t work actively by that time. Youth should enter politics in 2014 only. What is wrong if that starts with my young son only? Is not Rahul youth? Is not Priyanka youth? I mean is not India the family property of our Congress party? Gandhi died for this nation. Indira died for this nation. Many of our Congressmen also died during these 60 years. I mean martyrs only deserve leadership positions in cursed nations like India. I know some people cry here and there for a better India and the need of a positive change. Let them cry endlessly. They can do nothing. What could Vivekananda, Mahatma Gandhi or Patel do for this nation? One preached a lot to Indians asking them to change. One walked on roads to achieve independence for India. One worked hard to make up India a large and beautifully arranged nation after partition. Who are talking about them now? Ramakrishna Mission is printing books at low prices and distributing them to cricket fans and Pepsi lovers? They read them for a while and throw them somewhere. We are printing Gandhi’s image on currency notes for courtesy sake. We read a little in books about poor Patel. How many Indians are talking about these great Indians today voluntarily? Others must encourage them a lot to do it. Comfortable Indians are no more worried about other poor Indians. They enjoy watching cricket, drinking Coca Cola, eating Bingo and dancing in clubs. This is the spirit of true liberty and modernity in any nation. Let them do whatever they like. As long as they don’t interfere in our corrupt and bloody politics, we don’t interfere in their nasty and crazy lifestyles. Let them get any number of diseases and disorders and die in hospitals and old age homes. Death is inevitable. Some die early and others go away a little late. India is stuffed with the problem of over population. Better if many die on their own due to our corrupt and selfish politics. Natural calamities are welcome for us. Our party men can grab money from those voluntary donations and our formal funding also. I mean who hates money. We must take up useless and short-term projects only to keep India always poor because Indians want it badly. Politics means attractive tricks and strategic attacks. Grab political power resorting to any measure. We must retain our hold of power in every possible state. More and more Congress MPs must come to Parliament during these few years. It makes my task of making Rahul Gandhi Prime Minister easy. I know that MLAs, MPs, ministers and chief ministers in this nation do not have any individuality of their own. Learn lessons from Rosaiah in Andhra Pradesh. He always says “I am just her representative here. Don’t ask me anything. Burn this state or die on your own. I have nothing to say about it”. Don’t start new political parties. What happened to Chiranjeevi in Andhra Pradesh? He slipped into an inescapable mud now! He does not know to continue there or come out of it. Politicians change at any time and for any minor reason. Continue this trend created and followed by us. Deal strategically with regional parties because we need them to somehow cook soup at the centre and set up a combined circus. Take whatever you want. Just ensure that my son becomes PM next time. Is it clear? Take care!

I invited the souls of these people to talk in my world honestly and openly.

LIVE TRAFFIC