SENSITIVITY

Sensitivity is a feeling originating from the notions of empathy, sympathy and kindness for the other. It can be expressed or exhibited through our polite words or kind reaction. It is unfortunate to note that sensitivity levels are decreasing day by day in many countries now due to the impact of excessive liberty accorded to citizens in democratic countries and in the name of modernity, novelty and fashion. People are not thinking about issues from the perspective of victims but from the standpoint of their comfort zone only. Many, while enjoying their sense of freedom, are disturbing others. They are expecting others to accept and approve their vulgar language, ridiculous behavior and dirty character as part of modern culture. They have become a matter of nuisance to common and helpless people across places. Police have no control on them. Voluntary organizations cannot go home to home to understand and solve the problems of each individual or society.  Governments are busy in attracting voters, begging their votes shamelessly, acquiring political power immorally and then enjoying it unscrupulously. In this scenario of uncertainty, cruelty, bad manners and anarchy, let’s examine how sensitivity is being interpreted and followed by various kinds of people and institutions around us.

Insensitivity

1. Most of Indian parents think that they know what is right for their children. They buy such things for their formative children, which they think are suitable for them at different stages of their growth. They instruct them which school to join, which course to pursue, which job to prefer, which life partner to accept and which lifestyle to follow, based on their beliefs, experiences and conditions. They rarely allow their children to take a decision considering different available and affordable options. If their children propose something against their wish, they feel offended and insulted. From the perspectives of most of Indian parents, the quality of a best child is ‘accepting and doing everything suggested by his/her parents time to time without arguments, questions and doubts’. They expect loyalty, respect, affection and high degree of reliability from their children. They believe that their children cannot take decisions on their own. They take them as innocent, stupid and worthless creatures, who cannot think and live on their own. They get hurt if their son or daughter marries somebody without consulting them. They seldom realize that freedom is the ultimate gift they can give their children in their lifetimes. They should enquire about a number of options and alternatives available to their children at various stages of their growth and allow them to think and choose on their own according to their rational thinking, logical planning and morally strong character. I often wonder if there are rights to children at all in India. They are living to satisfy the interests and priorities of others at various levels. When a victim of domestic violence returns to the house of her parents, they are telling her to go back and adjust with him somehow because it has been the role of a traditional married woman in India for ages. If parents think and respond like this, what could be the plight of innocent and helpless married girls? On the other hand, parents are not allowing their sons to marry those girls whom they like. They should discuss the matter with them, show them the way ahead and help them do what is good for them instead of thinking that whatever their sons do is wrong. Indian parents are not preparing individuals in their homes now but pitiable parasites. They are depending on others mostly to take decisions in many contexts of their lives and professions. Parents should realize that they should play the roles of facilitators, guides and idealists towards their children when they turn into adults but not the roles of dictators, commanders, criminals and sinners. Honour killing is one of the worst facets of Indian culture. Does my son or daughter become a criminal and sinner just by living with another creature of opposite gender, whom I don’t like as per my parameters of evaluation of character of the other? Indian parents should think and behave kindly towards their children. Even if they are misusing their freedom, just advise, warn and leave them to their lot. Remember that you cannot rewrite their fates indulging in their matters excessively. They have come into this material world with a predestined role. You cannot alter it much despite your best efforts. As parents, we have many limitations in treating our children. We have no absolute authority on them to do whatever we like. If we do so, we are actually torturing and punishing them brutally. Good parents show suitable options to their children. Bad ones impose their options on them. If you fail as parents, you are contributing to unrest and disorder in your nation because your son or daughter thinks and behaves badly outside being misguided by you always.

2. A teacher should educate his/her students applying his/her knowledge and skills in a beneficial way to learners. It is not happening in the Indian educational system now. Most of the government teachers are going to schools, colleges and universities for those attractive salaries, facilities and related attractive social image but not with an intention to enrich the knowledge levels and values of their students. Private teachers are after money. They go there to teach a given subject as per the schedule. Students sitting before them are like machines. They paid for that intensive or long-term coaching only and nothing else. Inefficient and immoral idiots have entered the educational system in India extensively. They are not subject experts. They have no standards or values. They are not at all bothered about the future of their students. If there is no emotional bond between a teacher and his student, such learning system cannot prepare builders of a nation but parasites. Teachers should not scold or beat their bad students also because they have no that moral authority. They should inform his parents about his character or behavior so that they can take a corrective action according to their discretion. Teachers should facilitate learning in their abodes of instruction. Parents of students should prepare them into disciplined learners. They too should not punish their children cruelly just because they are not meeting their expectations. All teachers should love and guide their pupils with a generous attitude. If one fails to learn something good from his teacher in his formative age, he cannot fill that void later. He suffers with a sense of low self-esteem without basic knowledge and skills to live in the contemporary complex societies where many are trying to cheat, misguide and threaten him. Teachers must be embodiments of discipline, virtues and skills.

3. Divorce cases are increasing in India day by day. Ego is the main cause for most of our problems in lives or professions. Married life must be flexible but not rigid. A husband should not treat his wife as a servant but an honourable partner of his life. He did not marry her to have children, wash dishes and clothes, prepare food and keep house hygienic and orderly but to keep her happy and comfortable at his level. To make her so, he should treat her as a respectable guest. Then only we offer them many things voluntarily. Whether to accept or reject them is up to them. I should explain what is good or bad to my wife if I am intelligent but should not compel her to do what I like the most. I should never think that my social image increases only if my wife surrenders to me and does what I order. Similarly, a wife should not torture her husband asking him to fulfil her increasing desires continuously. A good husband cannot do everything his wife requests but can only explain why he cannot meet all those expectations from her. Biologically, physically, socially, religiously and financially a husband and a wife should be mutually dependent but not look for ways to improve one’s image alone. Life partner is not an object but an inevitable and highly valuable asset of our life. When millions of people around us have no time even to look at us, she or he is struggling for our safety, security, comfort and happiness. So, he/she is vital for our survival and excellence. A widow’s life is pathetic. The life of a widower is even more pitiable. It means divorce brings more problems into our lives. If we cannot love our life partner, who is an important part of our lives, what can we achieve in this world? Mutual affection, dependence and respect must be the guiding principles of married couples but not false prestige, hypocrisy and exclusive attitude. If one cannot understand the other with love and kindness, such relationship does not last longer now. One that has no morality and discipline cannot play a commendable role in a relationship of marriage in any age.

4. Police are supposed to be the custodians of law and order in a nation but they have turned into criminals and sinners in India. They try to impose their authority upon us when we approach them. They should remember that they are our servants but not bosses. They have no authority to beat a criminal also but this is what they have been doing for long. They beat the accused and do many such unlawful things. They threaten and exploit helpless victims in their jurisdiction. They run after VIPs like dogs. They collect bribes from all influential people. If morality and legality is the fundamental principle of their job, what are they dong actually now? They are begging alms from vehicle users. They are demanding money if one dies in our house or if we want a formal work to be done by them. Corruption and irregularities are pervasive in the Indian police system. Going to a police station in India is like going to a hell knowingly. They have no sensitivity towards common people and victims in society. They must change to the better.

5. What are lawyers and judges doing in India in our courts of law? They cite codes from the Indian penal code and argue cases on anybody’s behalf. Money and fast recognition are important for them. They take years to close a case. They facilitate presentation of fake witnesses to win a case. Their communication skills are pathetic. Their social concern is almost zero. For them, this profession is a source of income only but not a medium to uphold justice. It means they are not sensitive towards the burning issues of people and societies. They are whiling away their time without offering reliable services to victims.

6. For traders and businessmen, highest profit within the shortest possible period of time is the goal. They make, procure and sell any such product or service which gives them huge profits fast. Alcohol, tobacco products, professional killing and terrorism are easy routes of business for them. They are not bothered about the welfare of their fellow human beings but margins only. Most of the products are adulterated or of low quality in India. They know that their people only consume them and suffer. A businessman sells food items, beverages and also medicines through his hotel, liquor store and medical store. He finds all immoral and illegal ways of business to earn hugely fast. Governments don’t control them because politicians are only doing many businesses now. If a businessman or farmer is not sensitive, he sells bad goods to his clients and causes pain and loss to them ultimately. We find a number of harmful foods and drinks in every part of India now because only such idiots are starting and running bad business units.

7. Society is a system of persons that belong to different families. Who are playing the roles of elders in most of our villages and towns now? They are rich, manipulative and selfish ones to the core. When somebody approaches them seeking justice in a case familiar to them, they talk what they like but not what is righteous in that context. We are not encouraging good ones. We are not punishing bad ones. We are remaining neutral in times of urgency. When a disaster occurs in our lives, we are criticizing the society around us alleging that they did not help us in adversity. If you don’t care for others, they too don’t do it towards you. If you are too busy to guide others, they are also too busy to care for you when you are in problems. We don’t need money, resources and authority to serve the society around us but commitment and values. An idiot throws a liquor party to his familiar blokes spending one lakh rupees. A gentleman digs four wells with that money in a remote hamlet of tribes. We can serve others smiling at them, giving them moral support when they are disturbed due to an issue, teaching them what we know, offering them what we have and maintaining ideal and dependable relations with them always. Are we talking with our neighbours now? Are we helping the affected ones in our societies voluntarily? When we are insensitive towards our familiar societies, we don’t serve them. They too don’t help us when we are hurt. One with sensitivity understands issues fast from the perspective of the affected ones and rushes to guide and save them voluntarily. Many depend on us in a society. We must be able to look after them kindly. Beggars, old people, destitute children, victims, animals and birds expect kindness from us.

8. There is no sensitivity in the leaders of nations also. They don’t think twice or thrice before criticizing a nation. Why have Iran, Iraq, Israel, Afghanistan, North Korea or Somalia earned an unwanted image during the last few years? Ego of politically authoritative leaders and plight of financially inferior people are two major demerits of some of our nations now. Good and rich countries should help them to be happy. But how many heads of countries are thinking like this? India spends crores of rupees for national games but cannot give that money for a country like Somalia? America makes and sells ammunition to some countries but does not take sustainable measures to improve harmony among all hostile countries and avoid a tense or warlike situation. Double standards seem to be the culture of many nations now.

9. Superiors in workplaces are expecting their subordinates to work like bonded labourers. How many superiors ever ask their subordinates to criticize their decisions and actions quite frankly before all? Most of the superiors in almost every organization take crucial decisions faster without consulting the actual stakeholders. Consequently, because of those bad and outdated policies and procedures, those who are working at ground level struggle and suffer regularly. Many superiors are utilizing their authority to suppress their subordinates but not to think about their problems from their perspective and address them with a broader perspective. 95% of employees and contract workers are not happy with their respective jobs in India now because they are being treated like machines but not as human beings. If anybody offers constructive advice, finding fault with an existing system, he would be stamped as a radical and would be fired soon or later. Telling absolute truth before all has become a matter of crime now in India. I know about a problem and its perfect solution but nobody allows me to apply my intelligence because I have a lower and negligible designation in that firm. One with higher authority never tries to resolve this problem because he never feels it like me from my standpoint. Insensitivity to the feelings and opinions of others in workplaces is the root cause of all problems there. Labour unions took birth for this reason only.

10. Labour contractors are another lot of insensitive blokes in India. Companies, both in public and private sector, are opting for contract workers mostly now because they are not interested in the welfare of human beings but huge profits from their bonded labour only. Contract workers are mostly uneducated and helpless ones in all regions. They are daily wage workers. They suffer from hardships and poverty. They struggle for existence. Contractors exploit them paying them low wages. All contract workers are not good ones but even good ones are being punished because of those few in them. They chew tobacco products, consume liquor, use abusive language and behave somewhat indecently with others. So, we should treat them like useless entities. Employees with high salaries and benefits are forming into unions to fight against governments and managements for more salaries and perks. Then, how can a contract worker, with a monthly earning capacity of six or seven thousand rupees, live in the present society? Governments, managements, contractors and regulatory bodies have been insensitive towards them for long. Most of them cannot fight with others for justice. So, they are living painfully and dying silently.

11. Cock-fights, bullfights, boxing, clinical tests on animals and birds, child labour, atrocities towards babies, girls and ladies, abattoirs, corporal punishments in educational institutions, attacking enemy regions, religious fundamentalism, community hatred, class and racial discrimination, professional killings, murders, rapes, abuses of various kinds, irritating comments and insulting activities against the sentiments and interests of a community, region, religion, language, gender, race, country, agitations in public places, public nuisance, violence to damage lives and property…insensitivity is the root cause of all these evils and issues in our places. If we love others and if we cannot bear tears, pain and suffering in the lives of others, we never resort to words and acts of insensitivity.  We are turning into criminals and sinners day by day, moving away from sensitivity. When do we awake? When do we realize that we cannot be happy, irritating, insulting and bothering others? Wars broke out due to insensitive leaders. Families collapsed due to insensitive life partners. Businesses collapsed due to insensitive managements.

Levels of Sensitivity  

We often talk or behave with others arbitrarily assuming that they don’t feel hurt or disappointed by our offer, proposal, request, instruction or advice. Everybody has a level of sensitivity. How they interact with others depends on their level of sensitivity. It is necessary for all of us to know about the sensitivity of others and behave accordingly. Otherwise, we miss many whom we love and admire for some reasons.

1. For an aspiring film actress, it may not be a problem to appear others with highly revealing clothes. You should not expect such behavior from your life partner or beloved to satisfy your ego or fantasy. For her, even appearing to others in a nightie might be a problem. Once many orthodox Hindu women never dared go out without a covering on their faces or on the carts they travelled in. All have the same human parts of functioning. Some exhibit them for pleasure. Many conceal them for privacy sake. Accept both perceiving it from their perspectives.

2. We often hear about suicides committed out of emotional disturbances. It could be a reprimand from a boss in a company, a casual remark from parents, an insulting word from outsider, an offensive comment from life partner or an abusive behavior towards the other. There are then other kinds of folks who never mind even if we scold them harshly or spit on their face in a public place. Sensitive people don’t respond or react to the actions or phenomena around them. They choose to be silent and passive. Be alert.

3. Clashes occur between life partners, relatives, friends, well-wishers and other stakeholders of a network of relationship if they don’t consider the sensitivity of others. The casual comments of politicians and celebrities often become issues of unrest and debate. Murders too occur if we misbehave with others taking them as innocent or helpless folks. Retaliation has been a major trait of humanity for ages. They develop enmity and wait for a chance to hit the other cruelly. Insensitivity leads to pain and suffering ultimately.

4. When we are going to a new place or interacting with unfamiliar set of people somewhere, we should choose every word carefully while talking with them or restrain ourselves from quite stupid, agitated or egoistic behaviour. They accord more value to their language, community, religion, region, race, cult, education, tradition, culture, class or gender than we assume. What is quite negligible or common for us from our experience and perspective might be quite offensive and avoidable for them. Take care. Honour their feelings and beliefs unconditionally there.

5. The relationship between a superior and subordinate is also very crucial in a work environment. Just because we have authority and opportunity to rebuke the other in a context, we should not talk or react too much. Many don’t express their feelings immediately. They wait for suitable time to pay back. If you used two words today addressing the other in your rage, they throw 10 words when they get time for it. If you beat him today once, they stab you to death another day. The results of your insensitivity towards others would be so unexpected and intense that you cannot bear it. Insensitivity is a negative trait of humanity, which leads to distress and pain ultimately. Discipline and ideal culture are important for us. Thus we can attract and retain many relations easily.

Communication

We communicate with others to share information and get things done as early and as comfortably as possible. Communication can be carried out with or without words, depending on a context. The words we choose to communicate orally or in written form, the tone of the voice we use, our manners and gesticulations play important role in deciding the nature of communication and the results from the other end. Giving and taking respect must be our philosophy as far as our speech and writing are concerned. Everybody likes being respected, including a thief or a killer. So, it is our fundamental responsibility to respect anybody with a kind heart. Polite communication must be practised and used to attract others.

a. Come to the party this evening. Many of our friends and relatives are coming for it casually.

b. Please do come to the party this evening. We miss you a lot if you are not there from the beginning.

a. Where is the railway station here? Do I reach it if I go along this way? Just give me a little hint.

b. Could you please show me the way to railway station. I am completely new to this place. I am lost.

a. That drunkard died of cardiac arrest this morning. All such idiots die fast due to those bad habits.

b. It is unfortunate that he died today. He has been an innocent guy. How do his dependants live now?

a. Your son is an idiot. He is not coming to school regularly. Don’t have any hopes of his improvement.

b. Your son seems to be a slow learner. He is scared of coming to school. Let’s hope he improves soon.

a. The doctor is not inside. He did not inform us where he went. He may or may not come today.

b. The doctor has just gone out. He must be going to perform an urgent surgery. He may return shortly.

a. I will kill you and die if I cannot marry you. I don’t allow anybody else to touch you.

b. I will be happy if you marry somebody you like or one chosen by your parents. All lovers can’t marry.

a. I will punish you if you don’t score the highest marks in your standard 10 at your school level.

b. Marks alone are not a testimony to our capabilities. Try to get that many marks which you can afford.

a. I want such a handsome boy to marry who is rich, open-minded, modern, reliable and accountable.

b. For me, the character of the boy is more important than other traits. He must be virtuous always.

a. God, thank you for appearing to me. Give me such boons which keep me happy and luxurious always.

b. God, thank you for blessing me with your presence. Provide me with such things only, which I deserve.

a. As my wife, it is your responsibility to wash my clothes, clean rooms, cook and nurse me like a servant.

b. I like if you are comfortable and happy. Do what you like always. You can take my advice if needed.

a. Don’t tell me that you are poor and helpless. Millions of beggars are suffering like you. What can I do?

b. I am not in a position to help you now. There is an orphanage near here for people like you. Go there.

a. You are a loafer. You are not focused on your education. You will beg in streets after I die.

b. Nobody can be an expert by birth. You can achieve anything anytime. Never feel disappointed.

a. This is not a reserve bank to give you money whenever you want. Just get out of my sight.

b. I know that you need money. I will arrange it somehow. Understand that money is very precious for us.

If you wish to win the other, avoid the first sentences and use the second ones. Sensitivity is a magnet.

Good manners

What we talk and how we behave with a variety of people in different contexts shows our manners to others in the short or long run. One that tries not to hurt others even a little through one’s words or acts can be understood as one having good manners. One that never thinks or worries about the views and beliefs of others is actually following bad manners. Good manners are the real beauty of human life.

1. All creatures appearing in this world are creations of God. Every creature has a purpose. Don’t hate any creature excessively even if it hurt you directly or indirectly. All creatures are not as intelligent and strong as us human beings. Treat them kindly. If they are poisonous and dangerous, just stay away from them.

2. Anybody can kill mosquitoes, snakes, beasts, bees or flies when they create a scene of disturbance to them somewhere. One that drives them away kindly without hurting them even a little or one that creates a natural habitat even for such creatures is an idealist. All life forms are valuable for him. He saves and nurtures them.

3. Children below the age of 10 are generally innocent and straightforward. Never think that only your children are precious creatures in this world. You may not be able to serve and save all children from their plight. At least, love them. You need not offer them anything. Avoid being harsh and cruel towards them.

4. If God permits, all of us become old people when we cross 60. Old people cannot impress us with their beauty or skills. They are nearing their deaths slowly and painfully. Don’t despise them. They feel happy if we offer them a fruit or talk with them for a while. Don’t insult or hurt them with your insensitivity.

5. Most of us have aversion towards creatures of another community, religion, race, class, language, region and orientation of life. When we cannot love people, we cannot be good human beings. All die one day. Hatred and jealousy turn us into villains slowly. Unconditional love turns us into achievers always.

6. Often use phrases like thank you, sorry and please. We are depending on products and services offered by others. Thank them often. Others are allowing us to live peacefully despite our mistakes and blunders. Tell them sorry. All creatures are great. So, respect everybody unconditionally saying please quite often.

7. We cannot achieve much shouting at others and finding faults in them one after another. Mutual love, mutual respect and mutual cooperation lead us towards success and happiness. We can win all practising pure love and care for others. We should regulate our thoughts, feelings, emotions, passions and desires.

8. Many remain as helpless creatures in their lives or professions for various reasons. We are not great if we are in a better position than them in many respects but only when we can treat them as precious creatures of God. This requires broad outlook and generous attitude in us. Be a guide and support to as many creatures as possible.

9. Formalities are important in many occasions. We cannot talk alike with our brother and father. There are rules for everything. We should know and practise them to master good manners. The more you try to learn and practice good manners with all, the more the people that wish to love and spend with you.

10. God did not prepare anybody with features and qualities like somebody else. Others may not like what we propose.  Many ridicule us if we do something great for others without selfish motive. Always think right, talk right and do right. If you can satisfy your active conscience, you can love and respect yourself.

11. Life is an eventful journey. We never see back the station that we left back. So, treat all that come across you as invaluable assets of your life. Greet them. Feel them. Love them. Spend with them. Celebrate with them. Carry those sweet memories with you. They may not come your way again ahead.

Learning

We may not be sensitive by birth. We turn hard and unkind towards many things and people in this world in course of time due to our bitter experiences with others. We develop bad and avoidable impressions about others. We believe that others do not change unless we treat them harshly. We should remember that each person has a level of sensitivity. We cannot get things done by him or change him unless we understand him from that level. He may get hurt if we treat him cruelly thinking that all humans are hard by birth. Our communication and manners should change time to time in accordance with the situation and person at hand. If we remain insensitive always towards all, others hesitate or avoid approaching us altogether.

1. Each piece of meat we are consuming regularly was the part of a live animal or bird killed brutally by somebody minding our food requirements. We feel distressful and painful even if a thorn pierces our sole. It means we are sensitive creatures. All other creatures are also sensitive. We may not be able to refrain from consumption of meat immediately but we feel their pain every time we eat it, slowly we turn sensitive towards all creatures and treat them kindly. We should often sensitize ourselves. Non-violence must be our way of life as much as possible. We have no authority to hurt or kill anything or anybody.

2.  Many of us might have heard the phrase ‘universal fraternity’. It means we should take all human beings as our relatives. Scientifically also, our roots as human race were unique. We all originated from one source. There are about 196 countries now in this world. Many are migrating from one place to another for various reasons like catastrophes, wars, internal turmoil, opportunities and so on. We should not treat others inhumanly just because they came to our place in a desperate condition. We should love all because they are our relatives. We may not be able to help them financially but we can console and support them saying a few words of assurance and kindness. As part of globalization, mobility increased tremendously. We should know about and respect the tradition and culture of people with whom we are living. We should not treat somebody or something badly just because he or it looks irrational and unwanted to us.

3. If a tree falls down due to gales or if we cut it partly, it does not die completely. It starts growing back from that level of humiliation and inhumanity rendered by us. Again it bears fruit for us. It means many things of nature are treating us kindly despite our cruelty or negligence towards them. Similarly we should train ourselves continuously to be sensitive and treat others accordingly. We can be sensitive when we can control our anger, jealousy, hatred and carelessness towards others. We should behave kindly with our enemies also unless there is immediate threat to us by them. All look like our well-wishers if we have sensitivity and love them unconditionally. When we treat others as outsiders always, we don’t like or cannot accept most of the things they do. Inclusive culture demands generosity on our part. We should give others an opportunity to prove their guiltlessness. We should not attack anybody suddenly.

4. We need to be more sensitive towards those who are underprivileged, unfortunate and sensitive than others. They are so vulnerable that they cry within seconds if we look down upon them or throw a few abusive words at them casually. We should treat those, who are in pain and distress, delicately. They are like glassware. They look attractive and reliable to all of us from a distance. Actually they break if we touch them roughly.

5. Sensitivity is an art. One kind of behaviour does not suit all conditions. When we go to a house to console somebody, who is bereaved, we had better talk less and work more. There is no use of conducting condolence meetings. Solemn silence and a hug of assurance means more than a speech for long about the deceased. If we can cry being affected by intensity of an unfortunate event, it really reflects our sensitivity.

Acts of sensitivity

1. When we are eating something in a plate or other bowl, at home or outside, we should ensure that we are not soiling the space around our dish. Children drop food items because they are immature. How many adults are eating food or drinking beverages in a clean manner now? They do it like pigs and monkeys. Are we expecting somebody else to pick them up after us? Should we insult them like this?

2. Most of us don’t have sensitivity towards our wives or mothers. We make them into our bonded labourers. She should cook food for us, wash our used dishes, clean the rooms, wash our clothes and do many such things for us. Can we men do like them for one day for our family members? We want to go to offices or parties and while away our time just like that. They should stay indoors and serve us always. Is it fair? Understand and help them kindly.

3. When somebody approaches us with an explanation of pain and suffering, asking for our advice or help, just listen to him first. Don’t despise him because he came to you expecting words of assurance and solace. When the other is worried or distressful, we should discuss the matter within seconds and come up with a solution. Finding fault with the other is avoidable in such circumstances. Do not delay much. Act fast to help or save him from pain.

4. Never expect others to follow your orders always, even if it does the best for them. They cannot follow them for various reasons. You should not treat them disloyal and undisciplined just because they violated your code of conduct. Instead of it, try to know if your guidelines are too rigid and impracticable to follow. Before criticizing the other arbitrarily, check yourself if you have never committed such mistake.

5. We see many children who scold their old and helpless parents when they are dependent on them. We should never insult, irritate or bother those, who are vulnerable due to their age or other conditions. They get hurt if we misbehave with them out of our ego or false prestige before all. As your parents, they could not do anything worthwhile for you. What have you done for them or your children better than them?

6. Remember that all are not equipped with great features and qualities. You may be handsome, educated, rich, creative, talented, strategic, modern and visionary. Others may be innocent, stupid, eccentric and outdated. Continue your relationship with them only if you can bear their drawbacks and demerits. Otherwise, just stay away from them forever. Even a fool or thief does not like being insulted by others.

7. Express your anger or hatred directly towards somebody or something but do not victimize others. If you don’t like your neighbour, tell it on his face why you hate him. He understands and changes to your expectations or changes you to his expectations. If you beat his daughter, dog or cow, it would be a sin on your part. It is not right to bother A to retaliate against B. We should avoid indirect treatment. Whenever possible, communicate directly.

8. We are all descendants of God because we are next to God in abilities of all kinds. He is treating tigers, snakes, scorpions, flies, mosquitoes, bacteria, goats, lizards, criminals and sinners alike without discrimination. He is allowing all to live in this world for a period of time instead of killing them when they are against Him. Similarly, love and be patient with good and bad people alike always to delight them. All cannot bear rejection from us.

9. The priorities and tastes of all cannot be alike. I hate cricket. Many love cricket. I love females. Many may not love them. I am a theist. Many are not. I may do what I like and can afford but should not compel others to think and behave like me. If I have 

10. reasons to like something, others may have 10 reasons to hate it. Never expect them to like what you like. Learn to love them even if they are against your notions. They may change slowly.

Insights

1. Sensitivity presents you as a decent, acceptable, appreciable, approachable and kind person to all familiar to you. If all come to you to say something good or bad, you can pick up the best for you from those multiple options. Being accessible to all stakeholders is important. Let them speak out fairly and fearlessly. Just listen to them.

2. Being calm and balanced even amid a storm of complications, issues and ordeals is difficult but not impossible. When you can achieve and retain this psychological state, everything looks feasible and practicable to you. If you lose balance and take quick decisions to please others, you are actually sinking into a pit of additional problems.

3. You can become sensitive slowly, watching classic feature films, listening to soothing music, spending with victims quite often, reading classics, humming an inspiring film song frequently and observing the lives of achievers like scientists, social reformers, freedom fighters, voluntary organizations and so on.

4. Don’t act sensitivity repeatedly as a professional but become a person of sensitivity. If you act goodness to satisfy others and earn a good image in others, you actually punish yourself. When you act goodness, you suppress your bad qualities for the time being. Make your attitude sensitive forever. Transform yourself completely slowly.

5. Sensitivity is like an ornament to us. It helps us attract more and more towards us and retain them in the long run. When we are sensitive, we think about others and their issues from their perspective, moving away from our comfort zone. When you love others deeply, most of them too feel so towards you always.

6. In life, it is impossible to come across such people, things, events and circumstances, which are in favour of us. Many talk badly about us. Some praise us more than necessary. You can retain your virtues when you can identify what you are really and what you can give others. Avoid arguments and rivalry. Treat all fairly and decently always.

7. Inferiority and superiority complex are like day and night on earth. Everybody feels them time to time. Never believe that you know and can do everything. Understand that there are many great people than you in this world. Similarly don’t underestimate yourself. God gave you a lot of intelligence and energy. Utilize them often.

8. If you are unable to change outsiders to your expectations, find and be friendly with all those who think and behave like you. If 99 familiar folks are blaming your act, if you believe that it is absolutely right, it is better to ignore all those criticizing you and move on in the company of those who really love and support you honestly.

9. Sensitivity builds relationships. Insensitivity breaks them. We should be sensitive towards all those that come across our lives and professions even if they are wrong. People take a lot of time to understand the value of a virtuous creature. Don’t expect instant recognition everywhere. Wait and get it slowly always.

10. Don’t think that you are a worthless and unwanted one in this world. If you are feeling lonely, join others. If you are exhausted with multiple relationships and related burdens for long, just keep away from them. All medicines don’t cure all kinds of diseases. Be sensitive to your ideas, intuition and conscience.

11. Sensitivity means accepting and appreciating others though they are against your opinions and attitude. It is like growing a plant for years. Nobody watches your good acts. You may die before you realize your dream. Others may treat you as a brainless nut. Don’t get disappointed. Keep doing what you think to be absolutely right.

12. No person likes or expects insensitive behaviour from us. All expect sensitive treatment towards them. You will become sensitive after practising it every day for some years. Then you can find this world more beautiful.